The Right Side of Wrong
by runaway-run
Summary: When you have prejudices, it's hard to overcome them. I didn't like Greasers, I actually despised them...but Sodapop Curtis changed my mind.
1. A New Beginning

Hello everyone! I've already posted this story some months ago, but then took it down because I had added an extra chapter at the end to thank all the reviewers and they said I was not allowed to do that… So, I'm finally reposting "The Right Side of Wrong" because I'm thinking about writing a sequel…and you may want to take another look at this one:-)

**1- A new beginning**

The day my mother died was the most horrible one for me. Since I'm able to remember, my father and my mother always got along pretty well, even though they happened to fight sometimes because of my older brother, Lewis: he was a bit of a rebel and he could really drive them mad at times. I never knew if he did it on purpose or if he just didn't think before acting. But my mom loved him even though he acted like he was out of his mind sometimes.

Everything changed when mom died. I was fifteen. My brother was almost eighteen. I never understood why, but first he got mad at my father, and then he ran away. I haven't seen him ever since, and since today's my seventeen birthday, I guess two years have gone by since I last saw him, spoke to him, heard his voice. I miss him. Despite him being a jerk to me. I didn't mean to fight with him, it just happened. He always had a reason to be angry at the whole world and he didn't care much about other people...except our mother. That's probably why he ran away. He couldn't stand to live in our house without her. He couldn't stand to stick around.

Still, I wish he'd come back. I love my father, and even if we have our misunderstandings, we live peacefully together. We are not extremely rich, but we are not extremely poor, either: in my city, Tulsa, there's this kind of separation between rich kids who live in the West Side, the Socials, and poor kids who live in the East Side, Greasers. Me, I'm right in the middle: not a Soc but not a Greaser, either. I probably wouldn't mind having some more money, but I couldn't stand being a Greaser, a hood, someone with no decency and even less intelligence. I want to go somewhere. I want to be someone someday. I care about others, I respect people, I'm not a menace to society. You can't certainly say the same about those hoodlums. I never drive by the East Side of town because of them, and I hope I'll never have to. Yeah, Socials are stuckup, and even snobbish and full of themselves sometimes, but at least they don't go around causing problems to honest people. I'd rather be buried ten feet under than have anything to do with those wild guys. I'll never be involved in anything with Greasers, ever. I'll never speak to them unless I'm forced to, I'll never find anything good in any of them.

That's what I used to think...till today. Sodapop Curtis made me change my mind completely.

I had just left my best friend's house and was driving around, because I didn't feel like going back home immediately. I was also looking for some place to work in, because I had just quit my recent job, waiter in a McDonald's. It just wasn't worth it: customers were rude most of the time, the dough I was paid was practically nothing and it was too tiring.

I guess I was really driving absent-mindedly, because all of a sudden I noticed I had very little gas in. I needed to find a gas station quickly. Unfortunately. I didn't know anyone around where I was.

I sighed, slowed down and stopped some pedestrian to ask him where the next gas station was. He gave me a weird look, then told me the way to the nearest one. I thanked him and drove on, till I reached that station. I parked the car and took my sunglasses off (I couldn't drive without them, the sun really annoyed me). Then, a bored voice asked me something: "Hello, what do you need?"

I looked up: a tired-looking guy was eyeing me carefully. He looked about eighteen, maybe seventeen. I've never been good at figuring out people's age. Especially guys. I don't care much for them yet. It may sounds strange since I'm seventeen, but it's the truth: they all look and sound the same to me, and I just don't think they're that special. I can't even remember saying some particular guy was cute-except movie stars. They're a completely different thing. I could kill to meet James Dean. Yeah, I know he's dead, long gone, whatever you want to call it, but he's just so handsome.

However, the tired-looking guy was obviously waiting for an answer, so I opened my mouth to speak: "I just need some gas, I've ran out...of it..." I was slowly realizing he had to be a Greaser. With that hair.

He turned around, motioning to pick up the pump, but another voice, pretty cheerful, filled the air: "Hey, Steve! Go and have some rest, you look awfully pale today! Have you at least slept tonight?" I didn't turn around to look: it wasn't any of my business, even if that guy was yelling out loud. The tired looking one...Steve.. muttered something like "My old man yelled at me till two in the morning and wouldn't leave me alone", before leaving.

"Hi! What do you need?" the owner of the cheerful voice asked, sounding very different from his friend, even if he had asked the same question.

"Just some gas, thanks..." I looked up and caught my breath. Right in front of me was the handsomest guy I had ever laid my eyes upon. He had long golden hair, probably the best looking in town, and two wonderful dark- brown eyes; he was smiling and, boy, if that wasn't an amazing smile I don't know how you call it. He could have been a teenage actor, if he wasn't dressed that way... like a Greaser. In fact, he looked too attractive to be a Greaser. I thought that maybe he wasn't, or that maybe my sick mind was playing tricks on me.

I couldn't help but stare at him as he pumped some gas into my car. He was whistling happily, like he had no worries in the world. Once he turned back to me, I had to hold back a sigh, before asking: "How much is that?"

He replied, grinning. I could tell he was used to grinning, kind of an habit for him.

As I handed him the money, he asked if I wanted him to check the engine.

"Well, it's never given me any problems...I think it's just alright." I said, still staring at him like I had never seen a guy before.

"You never know. Better be sure everything's okay." Then, since I didn't reply immediately, he quickly added: "Checks are for free. I won't ask you for any money."

I nodded and he started checking things. I thought I could just get out the car while he was doing that, since I had been sitting for almost an hour there. I looked around: that was probably the beginning of the East Side of the town. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.

"Never been here before?"

"What?" I turned. The guy was still checking.

"Well, I don't remember seeing you round here, and since I work here all day long, I should know." He exclaimed. "Also... you don't look like the kind of girls that live round here..."

Was that a compliment? I wondered. Then, I answered: "Actually, no, I usually don't drive around here...I don't live in the East Side..."

"I see." He said, still cheerfully. He seemed a happy-go-lucky guy. "Well, the engine looks just fine." He closed the bonnet and wiped his hands on some dirty towel.

"Thanks." I was wondering how old he was, since he had said he worked there all the time. Unless he was kidding. He looked like the type.

"You'd better hurry up. It looks like a storm's coming." He pointed at the sky: he was right. It looked like it was going to rain soon, with thunders and lightning bolts and everything.

"Sure." I nodded. I couldn't understand how someone could be so handsome. It wasn't humanly possible…there was definitely something divine in that guy's good looks."Thank you..." I hesitated. I would have liked to know what his name was, but I just couldn't ask him in the first place.

"I'm Sodapop Curtis." He grinned happily. "It's my real name, no kidding." He added.

"It's a cute name...very original..." I replied. "I've got a boring name instead...I'm Sybil Forrester."

"It's not boring. It's a very beautiful name, fits you."

I almost blushed. Even if he probably said that to every girl. "See you, Sodapop..."

"See you!" he grinned, before reaching his friend who was smoking a cigarette not too far away.

I took the last good look at him before driving away. I was feeling strange.


	2. See You Again

Here's the second chapter!

**2 – See you again**

"Dad, does the car need anything? Like a change of tires, or…I don't know…"

"Why you're asking?" my dad looked at me curiously.

"Just because." I shrugged.

Still eyeing me like I was nuts, he told me the car was okay and we didn't have any money to waste on it. I sighed. If the car had needed to be fixed, I would have loved to go back to the station where I had met Sodapop Curtis. I couldn't wait to see him again. He was so handsome…he had something that totally caught my attention. Maybe the sparkle in his lively brown eyes, maybe…

"Sybil! Are you listening to me?"

"What?" I was taken back to reality by my best friend, Sophie. We were the same age and had been best friends since forever,or at least since I could remember. She was a cute girl: she had dark brown hair, hazel eyes, and a very cute smile, that showed her dimples when she grinned.

"I've been trying to make you listen to me for the past half an hour!" she exclaimed. "Are you dreaming about something? About…someone?" she grinned.

I reddened. "How do you know?"

"So there's someone!" she grinned again and gave me the thumbs-up. "You've finally came to your senses and noticed guys, right?"

I didn't say anything for a while. Then, I figured I could just as well tell her.

"Sophie, you must promise me you won't think I'm nuts…and that you'll keep your mouth shut."

"Of course I'll keep my trap shut! So? Who's the lucky guy?"

"He's…hum…he's probably a…" I took a deep breath. "A Greaser."

"Really? You're head over heels for a Greaser?" she sounded astonished. "Who is he?"

Surprisingly, she hadn't yelled at me I was crazy. Feeling better, I added: "He works at that gas station called DX…he's very goodlooking,…and I mean it…I've never seen someone as attractive as him, except maybe James Dean…"

"Does this guy look like James Dean?"

"No, they don't look a bit like each other…Sodapop is much more handsome…" I sighed.

"What did you call him?"

"Sodapop…that's his name, he told me. Sodapop Curtis."

"What kind of name is Sodapop?" Sophie laughed. I glared at her. She stopped.

"Okay, sorry…so the only way to see him is going to that gas station?"

"Apparently, yes. Do you think there's some place to work in, around the East Side?"

"The East Side? Full of Greasers? You wanna go work there? Are you nuts?"

"Shut up! I'm not nuts…if you saw Sodapop, you would understand he's worth it…" I sighed. "He's…I don't know… he looks like a Greek God…"

Sophie stared at me, shocked. "You have a serious crush on him."

"I think so."

"Well, I think it's time for my mom's car to be checked."

"What?"

"You have an excuse to see him if you and I go to the DX and I ask him to have a look at my car…"

"No way! He'd understand that something's going on…I've never been there before and all of a sudden I go there with my friends…just…no!"

"But…"

"No!" I repeated. "Besides, if Julian knew about it, he'd probably kill you."

"He wouldn't know about it…and it's not like I wanna hit on that guy…I leave him to you, it's you the one who likes him. And I love Julian too much to betray him. I'm just curious to see this guy that managed to catch your attention."

In the end, I didn't let Sophie do anything. I had to wait for a week and did my best to finish the gas soon…then, I drove to the DX station.

As soon as I got there, I started looking around…but Sodapop wasn't there. Maybe he had lied and he didn't work full time. Maybe it was his day off. Maybe he had just left, since it was 6 pm.

I sighed and waited for the guy working there to reach me. After I was done with the gas, I decided I didn't feel like going back that soon. I drove around a bit, till I noticed some big store. I figured I'd go buy some book: I hadn't read any novel in a while and, being a huge book worm, that was pretty strange for me.

I was scanning through the books till I noticed _The Catcher in the Rye_ by JD Salinger. Someone had mentioned it to me once and I thought I may as well read it.

"Hey, Pony, have you found the book you're looking for?" a voice cheered. I noticed the guy next to me, around my age or maybe a little younger, was also looking for something, and he answered: "No, hold on!"

"You know turtles are quicker than you?" the owner of the voice reached the book stand. I almost gasped. It was Sodapop. I started panicking and thinking: Should I say hello to him? Or should I wait for him to say something? Maybe he doesn't remember me anymore. Of course he doesn't remember me anymore! I am just a girl…one of many he probably sees everyday…

"Hey, Sybil! How are you doing?"

I could just die. Sodapop remembered my name. And he was smiling at me.

"Hey…I'm doing great…what about you?" I couldn't think of anything decent to say.

"I'm doing great too. Well, actually, I think I'll fall asleep if my little brother here doesn't choose a book soon." He yawned. I could tell he was tired.

"You two are brothers? You look alike…" I said. The boy next to us wasn't exactly like Sodapop, but they shared some similar features.

"Yup, he's my 15 year old brother, Ponyboy. It's his real name…like mine…our father was pretty original. Pony, this is Sybil Forrester…"

"Nice to meet you, Ponyboy." I smiled at him. It didn't take me much: I was so happy I could have hugged my worst enemy.

"Nice to meet you, too." He replied. He looked a bit shy. And quiet. Yeah, I could tell he was a quiet boy.

"Pony, why don't you just pick up the first book you see?" Sodapop insisted.

"I don't want to waste money on a book I don't like…" Ponyboy said.

"Well, I think I'll just go and wait for you outside. Got a cigarette?"

"Yeah, here you are…" Ponyboy handed him a cigarette. I thought Sodapop was definitely a Greaser.

"It's getting dark…have you parked nearby?" Sodapop asked me.

"Across the street…the parking lot here was already full…" I answered.

"I'll walk you to your car. When it gets dark it's not safe for girls out here…"

"I don't want to bother you…" I lazily said.

"You're not bothering me!" he flashed his winning smile. "Pony, I'll wait for you outside, alright?"

Ponyboy nodded and, after I had paid, Sodapop and I left the store. He was right: it was almost dark and I hadn't even noticed. He lit his cigarette and we started crossing the street.

"Do you live nearby?" I asked, since I couldn't think of anything better to say.

"Yeah." He nodded. "Lived here all my life." He added.

I didn't know what to say without sounding corny, so I kept my mouth closed and just stared at him. He looked even more handsome than the first time I had seen him.

"You aren't a Soc, are you?" he asked.

"What?" I was a bit taken aback.

"A Social…a girl who lives in the West Side of the city, full of money, you know…" he gestured a bit.

"Oh,…no, I'm not a Soc…I live close to the West Side, but not really in there…I'm more in the middle, between Socials and…" I paused. I didn't want to say 'Greasers' because I wasn't sure if he liked the word.

But Sodapop finished the sentence for me. "Greasers."

"Well…yeah." I agreed.

"Do you like the Beatles?" he suddenly asked.

"The Beatles? They're not bad, but I prefer Elvis Presley…"

"Great!" he grinned.

"Why?"

"Well, I too prefer Elvis. I mean, Socs usually prefer the Beatles, you know?"

I nodded. "The Rolling Stones are great, too."

"They're tuff." Sodapop agreed with me.

I sighed. We had already reached my car. "Thanks for walking with me…"

"You're welcome!" he exclaimed cheerfully. He always sounded happy. I thought I could just as well ask him: "Hum…Sodapop… do you know if they're employing someone for part time jobs around here?"

"Let me think…" he crushed the cigarette to the ground with his foot. "Maybe…there's a store over here, they sell almost everything, it's pretty big…you could ask. You looking for a job?"

"Yes…" I nodded. "I just quit my last one and…the area I live in…they don't hire people now, so…" I lied. It probably wasn't true…but I wanted to work in Sodapop's area.

"This store I mentioned is quite close to the DX station…you know, where I work in…it's just two streets away." He gave me the indications to find it.

"Thank you, Sodapop…"

"Just call me Soda."

"Okay…" I grinned. "Thank you, Soda."

"Thank you for you company while my brother was lost in his own little world." He grinned too. "I guess I'll see you around."

"Yeah…who knows?" I agreed.

Soda smiled one last time, before turning and going back to the store. I almost collapsed to the ground.

I had just had a real conversation with him! And I hadn't even sounded like a total moron! And he had asked me to call him Soda, and he was just so sweet, so caring, so…

I stopped smiling. "I guess I have a crush on someone." I sighed.


	3. The New Job

Thanks to _Degrassichick_ (I'm glad you liked my story back in the day, too!) and _Tonyboy_ (you're one of my most loyal reviewers!) for commenting the first two chapters!

Disclaimer: I obviously don't own Sodapop (God only knows what I'd do if I did), nor any other characters…S.E. Hinton does. This disclaimer is meant also for the previous 2 chapters where I forgot to put it because I'm dumb. :-P

**3 – The New Job**

Sodapop was right: they were looking for someone in that huge store close to the DX station. When they hired me, I was so happy I could barely keep from screaming. I reached Sophie instead and told her the great news. She couldn't believe I was going to work in the East Side just because I liked a guy.

"He's not just some random guy!" I replied. "He's Sodapop…he's the most good looking, sweet and cute boy…"

"Sure. I wanna see him, remember?"

I rolled my eyes. "I start working next week, anyway. You could come sometimes."

"Yeah, and maybe you could tell Sodapop you work there, so he'll come by too."

"Sophie! He probably already has a girlfriend…" that thought hit me hard as I pronounced those words. "And he doesn't care about me…I'm nothing special."

"Are you blind? Do you need some mirror?"

"Sophie, just look at you and then look at me: I've got boring blonde straight hair and stupid blue eyes, and I'm so pale…you're tanned, your hazel eyes are beautiful and so your wavy dark hair!"

"You're out of your mind! Do you know how many people would want to have your blonde and long hair?" My hair almost reached my waist. "And hazel eyes suck, blue eyes are much better! And it's normal to have fair skin when you're blonde…"

"Sodapop's almost as blonde as me, but his skin is much more tanned."

"You'll drive me crazy with this boy till I'm alive, huh?" she sighed.

I just couldn't take my mind off Soda all week long, till I finally started working in the store. My father wasn't too happy about it, at the thought of me working in the East Side, but I reassured him: all I had to do was staying inside,in a place full of customers, not in some small dark street. He eventually gave up. I was a bit nervous the first day of my new job. Lots of Greasers would come by and they just made me so nervous. I didn't like them at all, I still thought they were hoodlums, all of them but Sodapop. And I didn't see him the following day. Nor the third day there.

The fourth day I was sure I wouldn't see him that soon anymore and I was quite upset. As soon as I arrived at the store, I went unpacking books and putting them on shelves.

"You got my advice, then!"

I turned around. Soda was there. "Hi, Soda!" I smiled.

"Hi! I didn't think you were serious with the idea of coming to work here…"

"Why not?"

"I don't know…I thought you weren't the East Side type."

"But I'm not a Soc."

"I know, it's just…" he shrugged.

"Did your brother find a good book?" I joked.

"I think he got something called… _The Holder in the field_…"

_"The Catcher in the Rye?"_ I suggested.

"Yeah, that one! You know it?"

"I bought it too. I have just read the first few pages, though…but it seems a pretty good book."

"Pony hasn't read much of it, too. But I think he likes it. Well, he likes reading a lot."

"I understand. I like reading too."

"Really? I'm left out then!" he laughed. "I never open a book!"

"Why?"

"Well…I don't know, it just bores me to death…I can't stand to sit still that much…"

"Maybe you just haven't found the right book yet."

"It can be." Sodapop nodded. "But probably I'm just dumb…"

"You don't look dumb. And I bet you aren't."

"Thank you!" he grinned. He was irresistible. I didn't know how I could keep from touching his beautiful face. "If you have any problems with guys here…let me know, okay? Some Greasers are pretty tough."

I nodded: "Alright, thanks!"

"No problem! See you, Sybil!"

"See you, Soda…"

He left and I stood there, dumbfounded. I had just had another whole conversation with him! His good mood just radiated. It was amazing.

The rest of the week flew by. On Friday I finished my duty at dinner time and got outside: some guys were standing there, smoking and cursing, and I thought they were probably close to some fight. I tried to hurry and reach my car, but I saw someone familiar, and I couldn't ignore him: "Ponyboy?" I exclaimed. He was standing there, with those guys, but it looked like he was the one they were mad at. In fact, they had formed a circle around him.

He looked at me: "Hi…" he muttered quietly. I could tell he was looking for a way to escape that situation, so I motioned for him to come over: "I'll give you a ride home!"

"Why don't you mind your own business, broad?" some of those guys asked me.

"It's my business what you're doing to Ponyboy." What else could I say?

A guy suddenly pronounced my name: "Sybil! What are you doing here?" He meant "in a place like this", obviously.

"Seth?" I wasn't sure if it was him. It was dark and I couldn't see him very well, so I stepped closer and saw it was really Seth Tucker, one of my schoolmates.

"Of course it's me! You know this hood?" he pointed at Ponyboy, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

"He's no hood." I retorted. "Why don't you go home? This is not the area you live in. Come on, Ponyboy."

Ponyboy reached me and I whispered to him: "We'd better hurry before they change their mind. I don't want to be obtrusive, but you and those guys obviously aren't friends…"

"No, you're right." He seemed embarrassed. We got into my car. "You know…I could have handled them pretty well if only I had had a switchblade or something…" his voice trailed off.

"What?"

"Well, it's not like I go around stabbing people, but…it would have scared them off." He insisted.

I nodded. "We're lucky I knew that guy, or I don't know what would have happened." Then, noticing Ponyboy's gaze, I quickly added: "It's not like I know him well. He just goes to the same school as me…he asked me out some times but I never agreed to date him." I explained, hoping I wasn't sounding too conceited.

"Thanks…" Ponyboy finally said.

We were silent for a minute, till I realized I hadn't even asked him for directions. "So…where do you…"

"Just turn on the left here, and then on the left again…I live over there." He pointed some house to me. It didn't look big from the outside. But it looked nicer than lots of other houses around there.

I stopped the car. He thanked me again. As I was saying goodbye, the front door opened and Sodapop came out. "Pony! Where were you? Dinner's almost ready! Whose car is that?" he came closer and saw me. "Sybil?"

"Yeah, it's me…hi, Soda…" I was feeling slightly embarrassed.

"Did you give Pony a ride home? Thanks."

"No problem…" I thought Soda would get mad at his brother if he knew about the fight, so I added: "It's my fault if he's late, we started chatting…about…_The Catcher in the Rye_, cause we both love the book…and we didn't notice time flew by." I lied. I didn't know I was that good at making up stories that quickly.

"I see!" A grin appeared on his handsome face.

Ponyboy looked at me. I smiled at him, hoping he'd appreciate that I had lied for him. But he still got that worried look on his face. Soda noticed that too, cause he asked him: "What's the matter, little bro?"

"Well…Sybil, you've got a flat tire…"

"What?" I thought he was kidding. I got off the car and glanced at the one Ponyboy was pointing at me. I cursed. Sodapop and Ponyboy looked at me, impressed by the words that had just escaped my mouth. "Sorry…I…I'm a bit mad…" I apologized. "How come I didn't notice about that?"

"I think we were too busy…chatting." Ponyboy answered. He probably was right. I was too concerned when we were into the car to notice that. Even because I'm so absent-minded sometimes. I sighed. What was I going to do?

"I think you should stay with us for dinner…then I'll drive you home." Sodapop piped up.

"I can't…I mean, I can't bother you, your family…I…"

I protested for a while, but no matter what I said, Sodapop insisted I stopped there. I gave up, since it wasn't like I despised being close to him, and we all entered the house together.


	4. Dinner at the Curtis' place

A big thank you to _Tonyboy_ (You really make me feel like I'm a great writer, I will never thank you enough!), _Degrassichick_ (yeah, I thought the Holder in the Field bit was kinda funny!) and _Babygurl33_ (I was very mad too when took my story down…) for reviewing!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this, except for Sybil's character.

**4 – Dinner at the Curtis place**

"Don't mind the chaos…Pony always leaves his books and drawings everywhere…" Sodapop said, waving with his hands, as we entered the living room.

"What? It's you the one who throws his clothes all around!"

"Well, it's not me who usually does the laundry! And it's the one who does the laundry that picks up clothes!"

"If Darry heard you…"

I laughed. I didn't understand much, but Ponyboy and Sodapop seemed to get along greatly.

"As soon as Darry comes home, we'll have dinner…which should be anytime…" Soda added.

"You don't wait for your parents?"

"They're dead." Ponyboy softly said.

"I'm sorry…I shouldn't have asked…" I bit my tongue. I was so stupid at times.

"That's okay!" Sodapop cheered. "It's been a while…almost two years really…thanks to our older brother Darrel, we managed to stay under the same roof. He's our legal guardian…"

I nodded. "You know, my mom died two years ago, too…but I still have my dad, so…" I shrugged. I didn't feel like talking about my brother.

Ponyboy and Sodapop nodded. "We know how it feels like. From the way he acts, Darry could very well be our father, if he wasn't so young!"

"You're hilarious, guys." A deep, firm voice stated.

"Darry! Welcome back! Let me help you with your jacket!" Sodapop reached his older brother and started goofing around, pretending to be Darrel's personal assistant or something. Everyone, even Darrel, couldn't help but laugh. The scene was so comical.

I observed him: he was a tall, well-built guy, with dark, shorter hair than Soda's and Ponyboy's, and I could bet he had been a football player when he was in high school. Or maybe he still played football. But I didn't think he was in college: it looked like the Curtis' brothers needed every single dollar they could earn and I was sure Darrel worked hard. He just looked like a hard worker and I could tell he was very tired, that night.

"Darry, this is Sybil Forrester! I've known her since forever!" Sodapop exclaimed, grinning.

Darry raised his eyebrows at him. Sodapop gave up. "Okay, I was only kidding!" He told his brother the truth, and once he was finished talking, Darry gave me a big smile and said he hoped his brothers hadn't scarred me for life, with their crazy behavior. Sodapop stuck his tongue out at him, but Darry pretended not to see.

Ten minutes later, we were eating dinner, and I couldn't help but notice Darry didn't look one bit like Soda or Ponyboy. The three of them were all pretty handsome (even if Soda was simply gorgeous), but Darrel was different somehow. He looked more serious than his brothers, but I thought it was because of the huge responsibilities he had. He was pretty quiet during the whole dinner, while Sodapop was fooling around and making jokes. I think I stared at him the whole time. I was almost sure one of the guys had noticed that, but they were probably used to girls gazing at their brother: he was one of a kind…even if he were a Greaser…

How strange. These boys were Greasers, but they weren't different from any other boys I knew, except maybe for their clothes and longer hair…they weren't hoodlums, I could tell: when I had 'rescued' Ponyboy, I had noticed those guys that I believed to be hoods, were all people I knew from school, people who, like me, weren't Socials…just in the middle. And Seth…he had scared me. I had seen a part of him I didn't know. At school, he looked caring, smart, a good guy; maybe a bit self-centred sometimes, but still, a nice person. But in that parking lot, his friends and him, were up to no good…I could bet they had stopped Ponyboy who was walking by just because they didn't like Greasers and he was one, alone, and they were four…

"Still hungry, Sybil?"

Sodapop's cheerful voice put an end to my considerations. I looked at him: "No, I'm perfectly fine, thank you…"

"Good! I guess Ponyboy and I can wash the dishes, then!" he exclaimed, getting up and putting some plates in the sink.

"No way, I'll wash the dishes!" I said, getting up. "It's the least I can do."

"You don't need to do that…" Ponyboy muttered, even if he sounded glad someone else was cleaning up instead of him.

"I want to. It's fair and square, after you offered me dinner." I protested.

"Okay, but I'll help you." Soda insisted. I smiled and he smiled back. I almost fainted.

"Pony, have you finished your homework yet?" Darry asked, changing topic.  
Ponyboy hesitated. "Well…almost…"

Darry forced him to sit at the kitchen table studying, even if I didn't understand how Ponyboy could concentrate hearing me and Sodapop washing and chatting. He suddenly remembered something. "How did you guys like that book, then?"

"What? You care about a book?" Ponyboy joked.

"Yeah, well, since you both seem to like it so much, I thought it had to be a good book…" he sounded weird. Or maybe it was just me.

"It is a good book, but I didn't like the ending much." I spoke softly. "It is really sad."

"I don't know…I liked the ending…I think it fits well…Holden clearly needed some help and just because he ended up like that, it doesn't mean he was a psycho..."

"You're right…it could have ended much worse." I agreed with him. "Still, it is sad!"

"Just think one day Holden will come out of there."

"Yeah…"

"I'm totally confused." Sodapop piped up. "And what kind of name is Holden!" he made a face.

"It's an unusual name. Like yours, little buddy." Ponyboy made fun of him. "You can't really criticize other people's names."

"Well, in my opinion, every name is better than Holden!" Soda insisted.

"If you say so."

We had finished washing and putting away the dishes and Soda glanced at the clock: "It's getting late, maybe I should drive you back."

I nodded. "Thanks…what about my car?"

"I'll change the tire tomorrow, with my buddy, and then you can come and pick it up…you need a ride?"

"I'll ask a ride to some friend of mine." I thought about Sophie: she'd love to come and see Sodapop.

"Okay. We can go, then!"

I said goodbye to Ponyboy and Darrel and thanked them for the dinner, before getting into the Curtis's truck with Sodapop. I told him where I lived and he headed there.

"How old is each of you guys?" I had been wondering for a while, mostly because I wanted to know how old Soda was, and if I asked the age of his brothers, too, it wouldn't look like I worshipped him.

"Pony is fifteen…Darry is twenty-one…and I'll be eighteen next week." He answered, smiling.

"Really? Okay, let me guess…Your birthday is…October 7th!"

"No…but you're pretty close."

"October 9th?" I suggested.

He grinned. I loved the way he grinned. "You're almost there…"

"October 8th!" I exclaimed, and, by the way he grinned once again, I could tell I was right. So he was a Libra. Cool. My mom was a Libra too. And Sophie…tons of great people I knew were Libras.

"Did I take the wrong lane?" Soda asked, looking around confused.

"No, it's alright…just turn on the left here…"

We were already home. Well, I was home. I pointed the building at Soda and he parked in front of it.

"You've got a nice house!" he stated, whistling.

"Thanks…also for driving me home."

"Anytime."

I stared at him. His eyes were breath-taking. His grin was breath-taking. Every part of him was breath taking. And his lips…I wished I could kiss him…

"So, hum, I guess I'll see you tomorrow? To pick your car?" He asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah…tomorrow." I nodded.

"Okay…bye, Sybil!"

"Bye, Soda…"

I got off the car and watched him drive away. I couldn't wait till tomorrow. Man, I was definitely losing my mind.


	5. Soda's birthday

Hey guys and girls! Once again, many thanks you's to everyone who reviewed: **Degrassichick, EmmaHermione1fan** (I'm guessing by your nickname that you love Harry Potter a lot and I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the series, too! And you're right, Soda's the coolest! I got this huge crash on him when I first read the book, I was about 12 I guess…anyways, October 8th is Sodapop's real birthday, S.E. Hinton said so!), **Tonyboy** (I hope you enjoy reading this story even if you already know the ending and everything!), **Cosmicweirdness** (Hope you like this chapter)!

_Disclaimer: I don't own The Outsiders._

**5- Soda's birthday**

"I love everything about him…" I said dreamily, gazing at the sky. In response, Sophie rolled her eyes, but I barely noticed.

"You can't understand…" I sighed. "He's so perfect…"

"Well, since we're going to pick up your car, I'll see him in less than ten minutes, and if he isn't a very hot guy I…" she paused. "I'll make you do my english homework for the rest of the school year."

"I'd do that willingly…I'd do anything for him…" I said, my mind focused only on Sodapop's face. "But I won't need to do that…you'll see…he's gorgeous…he's a doll…"

I could bet Sophie couldn't stand me anymore when we finally reached the DX. Luckily, she was a very patient girl and could resist the temptation to punch me.

We were approached by Soda's friend…what was his name again? Seth…Sam…Stuart…? Whatever… we told him about my car. He said Soda wasn't there, but the car was ready: he showed me where it was parked and I thanked him and paid, a bit disappointed Sodapop wasn't there. Well, much disappointed actually…

"How boring!" Sophie exclaimed, while the guy…Stan?…was checking her car. "I was hoping I'd finally see this Sodapop!"

"Sophie! Don't talk like that, everyone can hear you!" I protested.

"So what?" she shrugged.

I glared at her. She was dense at times. "Don't you understand…"

"Hey, Sybil!" a cheerful voice made me turn. Soda was there. "Hi, Soda…"

"Seen your car, over there?"

"Yeah…your friend showed me. Thank you."

"It's my job!"

Sophie coughed. I sighed. "Soda, she's my best friend, Sophie…"

Sophie shook his hand. "Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too! How funny…" he paused. "Have you noticed? All names of us four here begin with _S!" _he grinned. "Sybil, Sophie, Soda and Steve!"

"How strange…" I said, smiling. It was impossible not to smile when Sodapop Curtis was showing off his perfect teeth.

"We could join some club." He added, still smiling. Then, a group of girls came our direction, each one of them eyeing Sodapop like he was some movie star. He said goodbye to me and Sophie and was soon approached by that crowd. Man, was he successful with girls.

Sophie had to admit Soda was handsome…but she said her boyfriend was better. Since her boyfriend still looked like a baby…well, maybe not a baby, but you get the point…I didn't reply. I knew Sodapop was better. In fact, I knew Sodapop was the best.

I had a bright idea while I was driving home: it was October 6th and Sodapop had told me his birthday was 8th…since he had been so kind to me, I thought I could buy him a little present (not to mention I'd be able to see him again soon!), but the problem was…what was the ideal gift? I didn't know him that well and I didn't have much money to spend. I could ask my father, but he'd want to know why I needed the money and I couldn't tell him it was a birthday present for some boy I barely knew, and I didn't feel like lying to him. Also…Sodapop was a Greaser, he was different from the kind of people I used to go out with, and maybe he didn't like stuff my friends appreciated the most…

Then, I got it. How could I be so slow? I had the perfect gift pictured in my mind! I smiled and stopped the car. I needed to do a U-turn to go the right direction, to the perfect store where I'd find the perfect gift.

On October 8th I was so nervous I thought I'd throw up before I reached the DX station. I had picked a beautiful gift, I was sure of that, but I was suddenly panicking inside. What if he didn't like it? What if he thought I was nuts for getting him a present? What if I couldn't find him and had to go back the following day…?

_Well, you cannot know until you go there, you idiot! You've already bought that gift and you have to give it to him now! What's so difficult about that? _I thought.Maybe if I pretended it didn't matter much… I would feel better. But it wasn't easy…

Finally, I got to the DX station. It was lunch time and there weren't customers. I looked around and saw Soda, sitting alone reading the newspaper. It looked like he was trying really hard to focus on the page, but failing to understand. I smiled. He was cute even when he was that serious.

I slowly reached him. "Hi, Soda…"

"Hey!" he got up. "Great to see you! I'm all alone here cause it's lunch break and everyone else went home…I was left behind because I need to check some car…I was reading this just to feel less bored, but it doesn't work. I hate newspapers." He grinned. And I felt like I was melting. "Do you need something?" he asked, staring at me intently with his chocolate brown eyes.

I was feeling bad for him. His birthday, and he was all alone there! How depressing. "First of all… happy birthday, Soda! You told me when you drove me home, remember?" I added, since he looked confused.

"Oh…yeah, right! Thank you! I didn't think you'd remember…"

"Well, you've been really nice to me, every time we met, so…" I handed him the present. "So I bought you this."

"You shouldn't have!" he exclaimed. "I mean…I didn't do anything extraordinary!"

"I felt like to." I insisted. He unwrapped the package…and his grin became huge. "It's Elvis' first single! I love this song…thanks!"

"You're welcome."

"You know you didn't have to…" he repeated, looking at me.

"I know."

"You think you could stay a bit?"

"Yeah…I don't have anything to do, today." I nodded and sat beside him. We started chatting and we soon found out we had so many things in common, especially love for horses. Every now and then, Soda would glance at the record I had given him. Then, all of a sudden, he got up and started running: "Wait right there!"

I stayed there, confused. When he came back, he had two glasses in his hands. "I hope you like chocolate milk, because…well, here it is." He handed me one. Obviously, it was cool milk…and I loved it. It was refreshing and I was really thirsty.

"I know it isn't much…" he motioned to the glass. "But…I have another thing for you…"

"What?" I turned to him, curious. He had a serious look on his face. I wondered what was going on, but I didn't have the time to ask. Sodapop came closer and pressed his lips against mine. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the kiss: it was sweet and it tasted like chocolate, and Soda's hand was gently stroking my cheek. I felt in Heaven.

"SODAPOP KISSED YOU!"

"Shut up, Sophie! Everyone's looking at us now!"

"But…but…how? When? Are you two going out now?"

"Calm down! You remember it was his birthday on 8th, right?"

I proceeded to tell Sophie everything about that magical day. I thought she'd be happy for me once I finished talking, but…

"Why are you looking at me like that now?"

"It's just…well, Sybil…Soda's a Greaser…"

"Yeah…I perfectly know…"

"And you're…well, not a Soc or anything, but you're different…you're not the kind of girl who hangs around that kind of boys…"

"What do you mean, that kind of boys? You don't even know them! I met Soda's brothers and they're extremely nice guys, even nicer than some guys in this school!" I thought about Seth Tucker, who had almost attacked Ponyboy in the parking lot. "Why should you judge Soda and guys like him if you don't know what they're like?"

"I don't need to know them! Just looking at them, listening to them talking…I don't mean they're bad guys, Sybil, but…you may find yourself in big trouble if you go out with him."

"I thought you'd be happy for me." I whispered, before leaving her house. I was tired of listening to her speaking nonsense. Why did she have to talk like that? She had met Soda once, how could she judge him like that? I knew better…maybe I didn't know Sodapop Curtis well, but I could tell he was a sweet, caring guy. It was not his fault if he didn't have money, if he had to work fulltime…I wasn't sure about other Greasers, but Ponyboy and Darrel were good people, just like their brother…

I had to work that afternoon; I reached the store in the East side quite unwillingly, because I couldn't wait to see Sodapop again and working was definitely delaying our encounter. _But waiting is such a sweet sorrow…I think I understand what Juliet meant, _I thought, referring to _Romeo and Juliet._

The hours went by so slowly…I checked my watch twice to see if it was broken, because it just didn't seem possible to me that it was still that early. Finally, as I stepped out of the store, I sighed. It was dark already and as I quickly headed toward my car, I saw him, Soda, nearby, and reached him, with a big smile on my face.

"Hey!" I greeted him. "How are you doing?" What a stupid question. I had seen him the previous day.

"Hi, Sybil…" he was wearing some worn-out jeans, a white shirt, some jacket and less hair grease than he used to. He looked gorgeous, but, when he reached me, he seemed embarrassed. "I was looking for you…"

"Really?" It was great, hearing those words from him.

"Yeah…you see, I wanted to apologize for yesterday…"

"For what?" I didn't understand. He had been a true gentleman with me, when we had kissed: he hadn't been rough, or careless, and he had made me feel like I was the most important girl in the whole world.

"Because I kissed you…It never should have happened…I mean, you're-you can't-"

"I like you, Soda…" I quickly said, and then blushed: I had never told a guy I liked him. "A lot, not just because you've got a cute face…you're caring, you're nice, you're funny, and…"

"No, Sybil, you only think I am…listen…I'm really sorry for that kiss, please forget about it and…and find someone else, I'm sure you won't have any problem, because you're a pretty girl, you're sweet and smart, and…and you can't really like me." He looked around. "I have to go. Goodbye."

He turned and went away before I could stop him. I was too shocked to try, anyway: the previous day Sodapop Curtis had kissed me and I had felt the happiest girl alive and now he was pretending that kiss hadn't meant anything and we should just forget it happened. But I couldn't. I was in love with him.

A single tear fell from my left eye and I got into my car. I locked the doors and started crying.


	6. Seth and Soda

Hello everyone! Hope you had a great Halloween! Thanks to **EmmaHermione1fan** (you're lucky your birthday is so close to Soda's! Gotta love Libras, lol. I hope you like this charter!), **Degrassichick** (I know…Rob Lowe's one of the hottest guys alive! Even if he has blue eyes and brown hair unlike Soda, I think he matched the character perfectly! And yeah…Tom Cruise doesn't even look like himself in the movie!), **Jamea** (you're really dedicated, checking all the time to see if I've updated…thank you very much for your compliments, I really appreciate them! I'm actually updating now instead of tomorrow because when I read your last review I felt very flattered) and **Tonyboy **(thanks, as usual)!

Disclaimer: S.E. Hinton owns the Outsiders, I don't.

**6 – Seth and Soda**

I didn't feel like telling Sophie about Soda dumping me, if dumping was the appropriate verb. I didn't feel like facing the situation, therefore I spent the following week doing the same usual things: studying, working at the store close to the DX, meeting my friends, and, most of all, thinking about Soda. I had no idea why he had told me I couldn't seriously like him, because I actually had a huge crush on him! My feelings for him weren't some kind of childish tantrum: I wanted to meet him and talk to him again so badly…but I didn't feel like going to the DX, because maybe he didn't want to see me, and I didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable.

As I was leaving the store, after work, lost in my thoughts, I bumped into someone. "Hey, Sybil!"

"Hi, Seth…" I barely acknowledged Seth Tucker's presence.

"Were you leaving?"

"Yes, I was…I _am_ leaving, actually…"

"I've got some big surprise for you!" he smiled. His short, dark brown hair and his green eyes had always made every single girl in high school melt, but that wasn't my case. I didn't like him one bit. Sodapop was much more attractive than Seth.

"What kind of surprise?" I muttered, not really paying attention.

"Well, in case you don't remember, it's Sophie's birthday today, and Julian and I have organized this party…" he trailed off. "I'm taking you there."

"What if I have my own car parked here? Besides, my present for Sophie is at home."

"We can use your car and stop by your house, if you want, but we have to be quick, because the party's going to start in about half an hour."

I didn't feel like attending that party, but it was my best friend's birthday and I couldn't refuse. Half an hour later, Seth and I had reached the place where they were throwing Sophie's eighteen birthday party. I had just stepped in when I noticed there was a fairly large amount of beer bottles around, along with other alcoholic drinks. I ignored the fact and hoped the boys wouldn't get drunk, like it usually happened.

"Wanna dance?" Seth asked me, once the music had started.

"I don't feel like dancing, Seth…"

"Come on, Sybil!" he took my hand and pulled me closer to him. I didn't care much for his company, but I didn't even want to refuse. I didn't like Seth though, not after the night I had seen him and his buddies around Ponyboy.

"You know, you're really cute, Sybil. Do you want to go somewhere with me, next Saturday night?"

I resisted the temptation of stepping onto his foot. "Seth, you already asked me some time ago…"

"I know, but it was, like you said, some time ago. Have you changed your mind?"

"I don't feel like dating anyone."

His face looked emotionless as I said those words, then he said something that sent shivers down my spine: "How do you know Ponyboy Curtis?"

"What?" The real question, to me, was… how did _he_ know Ponyboy Curtis?

"You heard me. Let's go outside, so we can talk about it."

"I don't wanna talk about it." I backed away. "I have to go home." I quickly added "I'll see you around", even if I had no intention of doing so. Before Seth could stop me, I was outside, inhaling fresh air and chilling because of the cool breeze. It was a relief, though: everyone inside was drinking, even Sophie's boyfriend, Julian, and I didn't like people who did that.

All of a sudden I didn't feel like heading back home and decided I'd drive around for a bit, aimlessly. Of course, I drove till the East side of town. It wasn't like I was going to go over to Soda's house or something, but I felt closer to him if I drove nearby. I felt better. I wanted to talk to him, I wanted to stare into his lively brown eyes, I wanted to kiss him…again…

It was incredibly dark because of the scarce illumination and I almost hit some pedestrian. Luckily I was able to stop the car in time and I mentally scolded myself for not paying more attention. After all, I had had my driving license for almost six months.

"I'm sorry, I-" I didn't finish my sentence. The pedestrian I had almost hit was Ponyboy. "Ponyboy!" I exclaimed. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah…it's my fault, I was in the middle of the street…" he murmured, looking away.

"Are you sure everything's okay?" I insisted. He just didn't look alright to me.

"It's been a long day." He simply said.

"Get in, I'll drive you home. Or wherever you were going." Maybe I could catch a glimpse of Soda if I was lucky.

But I had no such luck. Once in front of the Curtis' house, I noticed lights were turned off. I thought that maybe both Sodapop and Darrel were still working. They had no easy life.

"Thanks." Ponyboy got off the car.

"You're welcome." I sighed. Maybe Ponyboy noticed, maybe he understood why I had sighed and how I was feeling, because he turned to look at me: "Soda likes you…it's just he's too stubborn to do something about it…but…I think you can work things out." He gently smiled and I immediately felt better. "You're a nice kid, Ponyboy…"

"Just call me Pony, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, Pony." We both grinned, before I said goodbye and drove off.

"Dad, I'm home!" I announced slamming the door. "Dad? Where are you?" I hollered.

I entered the kitchen to drink something and saw my father sitting there, looking worried. I didn't see him like that often, because my father was a happy and optimistic man, even if life had hurt him a lot. People said we looked alike and I guess that was true: his grey hair had been blonde once, just like mine, and we shared the same blue eyes, along with other similar facial features. My personality, however, was similar to my mother. "Dad? What's the matter?"

"When I got home, a couple of hours ago, I found this letter." He handed me some envelope. I read it carefully and gasped. "Lewis…Lewis's coming home!"

"Looks like he is." He nodded. "Pretty soon."

"Shoot, it's great! Dad, it's amazing! He's coming home and maybe he'll be able to find a good job and stay… he doesn't say what he's been doing all this time in his letter…" I quickly read it again.

"I hope so." My father smiled weakly. "Well…did you have fun at Sophie's birthday party? You got home soon…"

It was like he didn't want to talk about my brother. I knew my father had suffered a lot when Lewis had run away (I had too!), but I was really happy he was coming back home. I had missed him a lot, despite his rude attitude and often reckless behavior. However, I was sure things would get better, once Lewis came home and he and dad talked to each other. "The party wasn't the best I've ever been to…I felt like leaving, also because I'm tired…" Also because of Seth's insistence. That guy didn't understand girls at all!

"I see…do you wanna eat something?"

"No, thanks! I'm having a shower and then I'm going straight to bed…" I exclaimed happily. "Good night!"

"Good night, Sybil…"

When I laid in bed, I was feeling way better. Ponyboy had told me Sodapop liked me and my older brother was going to be back in town soon! _I couldn't ask for more,_ I thought, as sleep overcame me.

--------------------------------------------------------------- 

The sun blinded me and I was forced to open my eyes. I glanced at the clock on my bedside table: it was only eight in the morning and it was Saturday. I didn't feel like getting up, but I was already fully awake, so I slowly removed my weight from the bed and got to the bathroom to take a shower.

_Maybe I should go find Soda,_ I thought as the water poured on me. _Maybe it's the right time to talk now…_

All my good intentions were shattered not much later, as I was having breakfast. Dad entered the kitchen, yawning, and said it was surprising that I was already up. He smiled bitterly and told me he had to go check some business in his office. Since he was a lawyer, he was always pretty busy and I was used on seeing him rarely even in the week-ends. I never complained, because, even if I didn't really like his job and lawyers and laws in general, I thought he was amazing. And so his clients. Whenever I met them, they always told me my father was a very honest and smart man. That made me really proud. Lewis, on the other hand, never understood how one could wish to be a lawyer and obey all rules.

"Can I ask you something, Sybil?" my dad interrupted my thoughts.

"Sure." I happily replied. I couldn't wait to leave and go find Soda.

"Well, Judith should come by and leave some papers, they're about a very important court case and I don't want her to leave them in my office…"

"Why doesn't she just come and drop them by you, if you're going at the office?"

"Well, today's her day off, but she offered to gather the documents and bring them to me anyway. She should come by soon…"

I sighed. So I would have to wait to see Soda. "Alright."

"Thanks. I don't know if I'll be back for lunch…"

"Don't worry, I'll fix myself something. See you later."

Dad left and I patiently waited for Judith, his assistant, to arrive. In a couple of hours, I was bored out of my mind, because I didn't feel like doing anything but go see Soda, and I actually discovered I had wasted a day, because Judith only came by at four in the afternoon. I was so mad, but I couldn't tell her off, like I would with a friend of mine. After I had put away the papers, I immediately drove to the DX station.

There were at least a half dozen girls gathered around some guy. As I got closer, I realized that was Sodapop. I should have known. He was too handsome not to be noticed by girls, especially Socs, who probably thought he was a doll or something.

Some other guy reached me and asked if I needed gas. I told him I only needed to talk to Sodapop, but he was clearly busy at the moment. He shrugged and said: "Girls like him a lot. This station is often crowded because of his good looking face."

Who could blame them? I parked my car nearby, got off and waited. Waited for all those girls to leave.

They probably had no life. An hour later, I was still sitting on the same bench close to the DX, waiting.

"Sophie told me I could find you here."

I looked up. "Seth!"

"Surprised to see me?" he grinned. "You hurt me when you left last night."

"I don't think so…you could have plenty of girls, Seth…"

"Who gives a damn about those? I want you."

"Well…I actually…" I looked toward the DX.

"You know, I'm not stupid. Ponyboy Curtis is too young for you…but I know he lives with his older brothers…you like one of them, right?"

"Why asking if you already know the answer? And besides…how do you know Pony?"

"Some friends of mine know him. Sybil, they're Greasers! You can't seriously like one of them!"

"Why?" I got up to face him. "Why can't I like one of those guys? They're human too, you know."

"They're different! They dress differently, act differently, think diff-"

"You don't know them! You talk about them like they're aliens!" I shouted. I could tell my cheeks were reddening. I was getting mad.

"You don't even realize what you're saying…"

"Don't treat me like a fool, Seth, I know those guys better than you and I can't help it if I'm in love with Ponyboy's older brother!" I yelled. Then, I realized what I had just said. There was no need to scream like that! What if people had heard me? Lots of kids probably knew Ponyboy there…

"Are you sure you want to waste your time with a Greaser?"

"He's not just some Greaser! He's the best guy I've ever met, he's sweet, thoughtful, funny and nice, and I wouldn't change my mind even if you offered me a date with James Dean!" I insisted. "I don't care if he lives in the East side, I don't care if he hasn't got enough money from your point of view, I like him a lot and you'd better leave Ponyboy alone!"

"Fine…go and ruin your life with some lousy grease! Sayonara!"

Seth walked away, leaving me standing there like an idiot. I had the feeling Sophie had told Seth everything about Sodapop and me. I wanted to talk to her, so I reached the nearest pay-phone nearby and tried to call her four times before giving up, since no one was answering. She had to be out somewhere with Julian…I decided I'd go back find Soda and tell him clearly how I felt. But when I got around the DX, I felt disillusioned. Seth had hurt me with his words…I wasn't in the right mood to do anything as important as wearing my heart up on my sleeve in front of the guy I was in love with.

I was going to leave, but some drunk guy stopped me: "Hey, you're a pretty little thing!"

"Why, you are not." I replied, before trying to walk away.

"I hate girls who answer like that." He grabbed me. He was definitely strong, too strong for me.

"Let me go!" I cried.

"You can't give me orders." He pushed me roughly against a wall. I was getting really scared and I started yelling: I thought he'd rape me and kill me and I would never see my father, my brother, Sophie again…I would never see Soda again…I would never have the chance to tell him he wasn't a Greaser to me, but the best guy in the whole world…

"Let her go, you fucking jerk!"

Before I knew it, that guy was punched by someone and got off me, and someone else was gently helping me up. It was Ponyboy and the one who had kicked the guy, who was now running away, was Sodapop. He slowly turned to face me: "I'm so sorry…" His eyes looked sad and there was no trace of his usual grin. I was going to say something, but he hugged me before I could utter anything. "I'm so sorry, Sybil, it's all my fault! Are you okay? Did he hurt you? If he did, I swear I'm gonna kill him! God, I feel so stupid!"

He held me tight and I finally felt safe. I started crying, even if I didn't mean to. That only made Sodapop worry more. He started asking me questions, but Ponyboy told him to stop, I just needed to vent. Being attacked wasn't a nice thing, and he knew. I was listening and didn't understand what he meant…I'd only find out much later. But Soda closed his mouth and just waited for me to calm down.

"Thanks…if it wasn't for you, Soda, Pony…I don't know what…" my voice trailed off.

"What were you doing alone? You shouldn't go around here when it's dark!" Soda exclaimed.

"I wanted to see you…" I looked into his eyes. They were showing all his concern.

Soda turned to his brother. Ponyboy nodded and left.

"I didn't want to cause you any trouble, Soda…" I whispered.

"I'm the one who has to apologize…" he said. "I heard…I heard you talking to that Seth guy, earlier."

"Really?" I blushed wildly. Why had I made that stupid James Dean comparison?

"Yes…" Sodapop stroked my cheeks with his thumbs. "I was afraid…I was afraid of falling in love with you, because…I've already been hurt too much."

"I would never hurt you…" I replied softly.

"It's also…well, I thought I had no right of going out with someone like you. You aren't a Soc but you aren't a Greaser, either…you deserve someone better than me, because I-"

"I don't want anyone other than you." I interrupted him. "Before I met you, Soda, I had never fallen in love…I had never even thought about going out with someone and now that I've met you…do you think I would be that crazy and let you go?" I grinned.

He grinned, too. "I don't know who's the craziest here." Still grinning, he pressed his lips against mine. I kissed him back.


	7. First Date

Thanks to **Degrassichick, EmmaHermione1fan** (don't we all wish Soda would kiss us? Lol, I know I _really_ do!) and **Tonyboy** (don't worry, I won't make the same mistake again once I'm finished reposting this story! I'll make sure to thank everyone with emails or something like that) for reviewing! You guys made my day!

Disclaimer: I only wish I owned the Outsiders…

**7 – First Date**

Soda and I talked a lot that night. He told me about his family and I told him about mine; I told him about my everyday life and he told me about his.

But he didn't like being serious. He started cracking jokes and I remember never laughing so much before. Probably he was acting like that also to make me forget about that stupid dork that had tried to jump me. Unfortunately, after a couple of hours, I really had to go, because it was getting late.

The following week went by very slowly: I went to see Sodapop every day, at work, and we decided we would go out together on Saturday night, even though he wouldn't tell me where we were going to go. Probably, since it was our first date, he wanted to surprise me, or so I thought. I also talked to his best buddy, Steve, the one who worked at the DX station with him, and found out he wasn't as bad as he looked. He didn't grin as much as Soda, but then again, who did? Sodapop's grin was unique and no one else could ever replace a guy like him.

I hadn't told Sophie about my date with Soda, but I eventually had to, when she asked about going out together somewhere, since Julian was busy.

"Hum…actually…I am going out, tonight…"

"Who with?"

"Soda."

"What? Soda, the Greaser guy? How come?"

"Sophie, he's not _the Greaser guy! _He's an amazing person, so please don't call him like that. Besides, I'm still mad for the Seth thing."

"Come on, you know how Seth Tucker acts! He found me and wanted to know about you and why you acted like you didn't care about him, since he's so good looking and everything, and-"

"He's not good looking." I interrupted her.

"He is." She insisted.

"Well, Soda's much more handsome than Seth. And who cares, anyways? This is not what we were talking about. The point is…if Seth asks you something about me, Soda, Pony or whoever, just…tell him I don't want him to go around intruding in my life."

We said goodbye and I went home to get ready to go out with Soda. I was really nervous. I had never really gone out with anyone before and Soda was just so special I felt like I didn't deserve to date him.

I finally decided to wear some maroon skirt that reached my knees and a nice blue blouse, along with some jacket. I put some makeup on and waited for my father to make fun of me, since I never dressed that way, but when he looked at me, he just smiled: "You're really beautiful. This guy you're going out with better watch what he does…what's his name again?"

"Sodapop Curtis, it's his real name, so don't make fun of him, okay?"

"I won't! Original name…how old is he again?"

"He's one year older than me."

Dad questioned me for a while, then eventually went away (he would spend most of Saturday evening at his office…lawyers' life wasn't easy) and I waited for Sodapop to come and pick me up. When he arrived and I got into his truck, he grinned hugely: "So…what was today like for you?"

"It was okay, but I wanted to see you so bad." As soon as I had said that, I blushed. Soda, on the other hand, grinned even more. "I wanted to see you too." The traffic lights showed we had to stop, so Soda took advantage of that to kiss me. It didn't last, though, because they honked at us, once the road was clear, and I glared at the car behind us.

Soda wouldn't tell me where we were going, till he parked in this huge parking lot and pointed a small building at me: "That's it!"

I eyed it suspiciously. "It looks deserted…" I said. "How come-"

Soda cut me off. "Come on!" he took my hand and led me towards the building. When we got closer, I noticed a small plate, with the inscription _Rome's Reign. _I didn't understand. "What…?"

"You'll see." Soda entered and I followed him. As soon as we had stepped into the place, a man who looked about forty something smiled at us and greeted Soda: "Hey, Sodapop! How are you doing, boy?"

"I'm doing great, thanks, Walter! This is Sybil, she's my girlfriend."

I thought I was dreaming. Soda had introduced me as his girlfriend. Someone had to slap me really hard so I could see if everything was real.

"Nice to meet you!" Walter offered me his hand. I shook it. "Nice to meet you too, Mr…hum…"

"Call me Walter! I've known this boy since before he could walk and talk!" both he and Soda grinned. "I guess you want a table for two…over there." He pointed at a table in a corner of the room. Soda thanked him and we headed there.

"I brought you there because this restaurant is great! They cook delicious Italian food, this has always been my favorite place to eat…not with friends, of course, the atmosphere is just too much to handle for them!"

I understood what he meant: the place was really intimate, definitely not a restaurant where you'd go with tons of people to have a blast.

"Besides, I've known Walter and his wife for all my life, because they were friends with my parents." He explained. "This place is theirs'…they work really hard."

I nodded. "I like it. I've never been to such a place before…and Italian food is awesome!"

Soda grinned. "I think I'm going to have some spaghetti. What about you?"

"Oh, let me see…" I quickly scanned the menu. "Everything seems tasty…I'll have some spaghetti, too!" I decided at last. We told Walter about our choices of food for the night and once he left we started chatting. After a while, I thought I could ask Soda if he knew Seth Tucker, since he, Seth, talked like he knew Ponyboy quite well.

"Listen, Soda, I…"

I couldn't finish the sentence because Walter brought us our spaghetti. We thanked him.

"What were you saying?" Soda asked, grinning. He looked gorgeous. He looked happy. I didn't want to ruin the evening, and thought I could as well ask him another day about that. "Nothing…" I smiled.

The rest of the evening flew by. Soda made me laugh all the time, telling me stories of his crazy friends, especially one called Two-Bit, who I had never met.

"It's still early…do you wanna come over at my house for a while?" Sodapop asked me when we were leaving the restaurant. "Well, Darry and probably Pony will be there too, so there won't be much of an atmosphere, but…"

I cut him off. "It's okay, I like your brothers! You know…mine should arrive here in Tulsa anyday now." I had already told Soda about my brother, once we were talking about our families. I hadn't said much, but I had mentioned his "escape" two years before and his letter, which dad and I had received lately.

"Bet you can't wait!"

"Yeah…I wonder how he's changed. Well…should we go?"

Soda nodded and we got into the car. Before turning the engine on, he leaned closer and we kissed for a while. I was always feeling in heaven when I was that close to him.

But that feeling didn't last. When we entered the Curtis' house, we found a very injured Ponyboy lying on the sofa, not even able to stand up. They had beaten him a lot and his right arm fell along his right side, motionless. It was broken.


	8. Jumped

Hi! How are y'all doing? Great, I hope! It's almost two in the morning here, I got back from a Saturday night with my friends, but I thought I'd update! Hope you like the chapter! Thanks to everyone who reviewed: Tonyboy, Degrassichick and EmmaHermione1fan (aww, you're not the only one who's obsessed with Soda, don't worry!)

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own any of this. Just Sybil.

**8 – Jumped**

"Glory! Ponyboy, what happened?"

Soda reached his brother and stared at him, worried. I stared, too. I didn't know what to do.

"Soda…it's okay, I am not really hurt…" Ponyboy muttered, each word sounding like he had a hard time uttering it.

"Not really hurt? Are you kidding? Where's Darry? We need to take you to hospital!"

"I don't want to go, I'm fine!"

"You ain't fine at all! Where's Darry?" Soda asked again.

"I don't know, he still hasn't come home…maybe he had some extra work to do…"

"We'll leave him a note, we have to go to the hospital right now! Sybil, can you drop a couple of lines for Darry to tell him?"

"Sure…" I found a piece of paper and a pen and I left a quick note. I was feeling totally useless, especially during the ride to the hospital. Ponyboy was really pale. He was leaning against me, to feel more comfortable, in the back seat, since Soda was the one driving.

"How could you reach home beaten like that?" Soda asked. Ponyboy just shook his head. "I told you, I don't feel that bad." It didn't take a genius to see he was lying. I was feeling really bad for him.

"Who jumped you?" Soda inquired.

"Some Socs…well, they weren't all Socs…there were a couple of normal people too."

"Normal people…you mean like me?" I intervened.

Ponyboy suddenly looked awkward. "No…you're not like them…"

We didn't say much else after that. At the hospital Soda and I had to wait while some nurse put Ponyboy's arm in some plaster and Darrel eventually reached us, along with Steve and another guy I didn't know.

"What happened, Soda?"

"They jumped Pony, he's got a broken arm and some bruises, but he's still better than Johnny the time…y'know… he was jumped." He said, his voice shaking. I wondered who Johnny was.

"So he's alright?" Darrel insisted.

"Yeah, he will be."

"Cheers! We have to throw a huge party with rivers of beer flowing!" the guy I didn't know exclaimed, grinning.

"Two-Bit, shut up! It's not funny!" Darrel insisted.

"Why, it is indeed. Who's this beautiful girl I have not had the honor to meet yet?"

The look on his face was so comical I couldn't help but laugh. Sodapop half smiled and introduced us.

"Why do they call you Two-Bit?" I asked, curious.

"Because my real name is too beautiful to be disgraced by their mouths..."

"And that is?"

"Oh…let me think about it…" he pretended to concentrate really hard. I laughed again. He finally answered: "My full name is Brandon Phoenix James Matthews."

"Really?"

"No." Steve answered for him. "His real name is Keith Mathews."

"How could you reveal that!" Two-Bit glared at Steve, who just rolled his eyes and cussed.

"Pony!"

Darrel's shout made us all turn around. Ponyboy had left the room with part of his arm in a plaster and was staring at us, with a slight smirk on his face. He still looked quite pale though. "Can we leave now?"

"How do you feel?" his oldest brother inquired.

"Relax, Darry, I'm fine! But I'm tired and I'd like some sleep…"

While Darrel signed some papers, the rest of us waited outside; I couldn't help but think about Seth. I decided to ask Ponyboy. "Hey, Pony, listen…" I said in a whisper, so that Soda, Steve and Two-Bit would not hear. Well, they couldn't anyway: Two-Bit was telling them some joke and they were listening, trying to decide if they should laugh or just hit him. "The guys who jumped you…was Seth Tucker one of them?"

"Seth Tucker?" Pony looked startled. "No…he wasn't there…why?"

"Just…just wondering." Then I thought about Seth's best friend, Fabian Mansfield. But I didn't have the chance to ask Pony, because Darrel reached us and we all got into the truck.

----------------------------------------------------------------------- 

The following day, at school, I was trying desperately to avoid Sophie: I didn't feel like talking to her after what she had said about Sodapop. I reached my locker to pick up some books I needed for the following lessons and I bumped right into Fabian. He smiled at me. "What's up, Sybil?"

I looked at him. He was the same as usual…but his hands…

"What did you do to your right hand?" I asked.

"Oh…nothing, I just…"

He tried to hide it, but I grabbed it and looked at his knuckles: they were skinned. "Who did you hit last night?" I asked.

"No one…some stupid good for nothing kid who lives…far away from here."

I was going to ask for more details, when Seth reached us, grinning: "Wonderful day today, isn't it?" He glanced at Fabian. The latter nodded. And that was when I understood. "You told him to go jump Ponyboy…" I said, barely audible.

"What?" Seth raised his eyebrows. "What did you say?"

I took a deep breath. But I was really mad. I started walking away, but Seth came after me. "Hey…"

I quickly turned and hit his face as hard as I could. He wasn't expecting that and almost fell. I noticed with pleasure his nose had started bleeding.

"What got into you?" Fabian yelled.

I realized it was Fabian the one who had beaten up Ponyboy and decided it wouldn't be bad to hit him too, but…

"What's the matter?"

Mrs. Trenton, the principal, was looking at us sternly. She wasn't the only one: a small crowd had gathered round us and Sophie and Julian were trying to reach me.

"Nothing, I just…I hit my face with my locker." Seth quickly lied.

Mrs. Trenton eyed him suspiciously. She wasn't one to buy such made-up lies. But maybe she wasn't in the mood to punish anyone that day, because she only said "Be more careful" before returning to her office.

I decided to skip the following lesson and ran out of the school building. I wanted to go talk to Soda. When I reached the DX station, he was checking some car with Steve and he didn't notice me till Steve elbowed him hard. "Sybil! Hey!" he got up grinning. "It's great to see you!"

"You too…" I smiled. "How's Ponyboy?"

"He's feeling better, after a night of rest…Darry wouldn't let him skip school, so that means Pony's not so bad, after all." He grinned. Car oil and dirt was on his hands, his arms and part of his face. But he looked gorgeous. I wanted to kiss him so bad.

"Soda, I-"

I was cut off by Soda's lips pressing against mine, as if he had read my mind. I could hear Steve's mocking whistles, but I didn't care. Once we parted, I stroked Soda's cheek. He grinned. "You're getting dirt on your hand."

"Who cares?"

I proceeded to tell him about that day's happenings. He grinned when I told him I had punched Seth in his face. He grinned even more when I told him my hand was hurting, then he made me put it under some cold water.

"I feel bad, it's all my fault if Pony got jumped…" I said, while Soda handed me something to drink. He gave me a puzzled look and I told him about Seth, the way he wouldn't leave me alone, how he knew about me liking one of Ponyboy's brothers.

"It's not your fault, Sybil, now don't worry about that. I think I have an idea…" Soda's grin widened.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, I'll explain once I've talked with the boys about that. Do you wanna have lunch with me? And Steve?" he immediately added. "But maybe you have to go back to school…" he pondered outloud.

"Let's see…I could go and try to stay awake during math and chemistry…or I could stay here with you guys…" I pretended to be deep in thought. "I think I'll stay here."

Soda grinned and kissed my forehead. "We'll finish soon, okay?" he said, pointing at the car he and Steve were working on.

I nodded and sat on a bench nearby, watching him work. I could have finished a book I was reading for school, but I didn't feel like taking my eyes off Sodapop. He was much more tempting than any book.


	9. Halloween

Thanks to Jamea (I'm glad you like my story so much!) and Tonyboy (That's good to know you think I keep Two-Bit in character! I always try my best not to spoil any original character from the book) for reviewing!

Disclaimer: I don't own The Outsiders

**9 - Halloween**

"Happy Halloween, kids! And congrats for your costumes, they are really scary!"

I smiled and shut the front door.

"There was no need to lie…their costumes were pathetic."

"Like when you dressed up, years ago, you were much better."

"Well, I never dressed like a huge pumpkin."

I laughed, as Sodapop rolled his eyes to his little brother. "Boys, come on! Do you want some hot chocolate? I think the next kids to stop by can help themselves…I left some candies outside."

"I love hot chocolate!" Soda and Pony said at the same time.

"I guess love for chocolate runs in the family!" I exclaimed, as we headed into the kitchen.

Sodapop, Ponyboy and I were at home. Mine, to be correct. My father had left for Oklahoma City since the following day he'd have a very important court case to face there. He didn't like the thought of leaving me alone, especially on Halloween, but I had told him I'd have some friends come over and he didn't have to worry. Then, I had told Soda about it, and he and Ponyboy had come along: Darrel said he'd relax since the night would be one of the few where he could stay alone and rest, and Steve and Two-Bit were going out with their girlfriends (or, in Two-Bit's case, some blonde girl he found attractive, like Ponyboy told me). My father had already phoned twice and I wished he'd stop. Pony and Soda, on the other hand, weren't feeling too comfortable when they stepped into my home, but when I told them dad still hadn't finished paying for it and half the furniture inside, they relaxed.

"I think it's time you tell me what happened with Seth." I said, pouring some hot chocolate in Ponyboy's cup. He couldn't use his right arm yet: he'd have to keep it in plaster for another dozen days or so.

"Oh, that." Soda grinned. "I thought it would spread like wildfire at your school…"

"I've heard nothing." I said. Thinking about it, I had been avoiding Sophie, Julian and most of my other friends at school lately. I liked staying alone better. I could daydream about Soda all the time and not have to listen about Julian's complaints about how much school sucked or Sophie's remarks on all those stupid bands she liked.

"Why won't you tell Sybil about that?" Pony asked, sipping his chocolate. "I think it's better if you tell her, rather then have her finding it out at school."

"Well…" Soda looked at me and grinned. "I guess Pony's right." He finished drinking his chocolate while I stared at him. I was feeling quite impatient. "So?"

"Do you know Cherry Valance?"

That was it…Soda had gone nuts. Why was he asking me about this Cherry something instead of telling me about Seth? "What?"

"I guess you don't know her, then. Well, she attends the same high school as Pony. Anyway, this girl…she's really pretty…"

"Oh, is she?" I suddenly didn't want to listen to him anymore. I was feeling strange, like I had never felt before. But Soda didn't notice anything and kept on talking. "Cherry knows that Fabian guy, she told us he always hits on her but she doesn't like him. However, she met him and she pretended she had changed her mind and asked him for a date: he said he couldn't wait and they decided they would go out that same evening."

I was starting to understand why he had asked me if I knew that girl. "How do you know this girl?" I asked. Soda just waved as if he wanted to ignore that. "Cherry also said, since it was their first date, it would be better to have a double date, so they could feel at their ease…Fabian said he didn't mind and that if it was okay he'd ask his best friend to come along. Seth Tucker. It was exactly what Cherry, and us, had hoped for."

Soda paused. "Could I have some more?" he pointed at his cup. I poured some more chocolate in his cup and in Ponyboy's, too. "So what happened then?"

"They went out. Cherry's friend…what was her name again, Pony? Well, it doesn't matter. They went to the movies and had a good time…well, Cherry pretended to…and then, when they went back to Seth's car…very expensive one, ain't it? They found out it wasn't there anymore."

"How come?"

"Cherry had suggested that Seth and Fabian left their car in a particular spot of the parking lot. Steve, Two-Bit and I went there and moved the car…we put in in front of the gate of this big house where a huge sign pointed, _No parking._ The owners called the nearest station to remove the car because they needed to go out and Seth's car was in the way."

I smiled. "So they took the car away?"

"Yeah. I think Seth has found it by now, though…it was three days ago…he probably called every station in town…"

"What about Cherry and her friend?"

"They pretended they were mad because the car had disappeared and called their parents to pick them up. Cherry told Fabian she was so mad she wasn't sure she wanted to go out with him again and they left."

Soda was laughing by now. "You should have seen his face. And Seth's face, too. He was miserable."

"How could you see them?"

"We just walked by. Seth doesn't know us, so he wouldn't suspect anything. We got into our car and drove away."

I thought for a moment. "I guess nobody at school knows because it would hurt Seth's reputation if people knew he was such an idiot as to 'lose' his car."

"I guess so, too." Soda was still laughing.

"But…I don't think that's enough after he's jumped Pony…" I glanced at Ponyboy. He was smiling, too, but he didn't look too pleased.

"Don't worry about that." Sodapop said, firmly. I had the feeling he wasn't being total honest with me. Then I mentally slapped myself. How could I think he was lying to me? He wasn't that kind of guy.

"Now, I think it's time to watch the horror movie, which is Halloween-theme related!" Soda happily said.

"Do we have to?" I muttered.

"Don't tell me _Dracula_ scares you, Sybil!" Soda mocked me.

"_Dracula?"_

"Yeah, we rented this one. Are you easily scared by stuff?"

"No, _Dracula'_s fine with me." I assured him, even if I wasn't feeling that confident. I had never liked horror movies, I was a total sucker when it came down to scary stuff and things like that. But I didn't want to look like a fool in front of Soda and Pony, so I pretended I was comfortable with the idea of watching the movie, put the tape in the video recorder, then sat on the couch between Soda and Pony.

"We weren't sure if we should rent _Nosferatu_ or _Dracula,_ but we chose this one cause _Nosferatu_ is a mute movie." Soda said, smiling. "I've heard it's really scary, though. But of course, _Dracula's_ the scariest."

That feeling of awkwardness started to rise. "Really?"

"Yup." Soda nodded. "Pony doesn't like this kind of movies, either."

"It's not true!" Ponyboy protested. "They don't scare me, I just prefer another kind of movies. And I'm the one who loves movies, anyway. You can't sit still long enough to enjoy one."

I looked at Soda, who replied: "Yeah, but horror movies are different. There's action, you can feel the thrill watching those, so I like 'em."

We stopped talking because the movie had started. When we were halfway through, I was already scared to death. I couldn't help but glance nervously around: we had turned the lights off and I didn't like the darkness, even if the TV glowed. "Do you want me to turn the lights on?" I asked, hoping Pony or Soda were tired of the darkness, too.

"Naw, that's okay. There's more atmosphere with the lights turned off." Sodapop answered, grinning. "Unless it's you the one who wants to turn them on."

"No, it doesn't matter." I lied. As the minutes went by, I felt worse. I got closer to Sodapop, to feel better, and he put an arm around me. "Sybil, are you sure you don't want to turn the lights on?"

"I…" I couldn't finish my sentence because a horrible scene was on, and I closed my eyes not to see anything that would give me nightmares afterwards. Soda grinned and kissed my forehead. "I think we'd better turn the TV off."

"We have to see the whole movie…or it doesn't make sense." I quickly said. I didn't want to turn it off and give everyone a reason to laugh at me. So we finished watching the movie and when it ended I sighed. "Well…cool movie."

"Don't lie, Sybil…it scared you something awful!" Soda smiled and Ponyboy did the same.

"Alright, so it scared me, I admit it…" I muttered. "How could you two not get scared?"

"It's just a movie…it ain't like it's real."

"I know, but it looks real…it makes you think certain things could happen…"

It was way past midnight and the boys had to go home. Ponyboy said goodnight and went outside, to leave me and Soda alone for a couple of minutes. "Are you sure you're not scared anymore?"

"Yes, I am…well, actually…no. I'm still scared, but I'll go straight to bed now, so…" I thought of those stairs and corridor I needed to go to reach my bedroom. Maybe I could just sleep on the sofa. "If you weren't here with Ponyboy, I'd ask you to stay." I blushed. I shouldn't have said such a thing, it made me sound like I was some kind of cheap broad. But Soda just grinned and kissed me: "Maybe another time I will."

I remembered something. "Is that Cherry a pretty girl?"

"I guess so."

"How do you know her?"

"Sybil, are you jealous?"

"No." I felt something inside melt, looking at Soda's breath-taking eyes. "Yes, I am."

"I don't care one bit about Cherry. I don't even know her that well. She was Pony's first crush."

"I see."

"I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

I nodded again. "Good night, Soda…"

"Good night. I hope you have sweet dreams…" he kissed me one last time before leaving.

I went back to the living room and sighed. I was feeling completely in love. Still a bit scared because of the movie, I decided not to act like a child and go upstairs, but the doorbell rang. Maybe Soda and Pony had forgotten something.

I opened the door and caught my breath. The tall, slender figure standing there looked surprised, too.

"Hello, little sister. Long time no see."


	10. Back home

Thank you Tonyboy and EmmaHermione1fan for your reviews! This chapter is going to be really long, I hope you appreciate that:-)

Disclaimer: I don't own The Outsiders…

**10 – Back home**

"Lewis!" I cried, throwing my arms around his neck. I held him tight. Then, I pulled away. "You're an idiot!"

"What? Why?"

"Why?" I repeated in disbelief. "You disappeared for two years, you never called, never said anything…don't expect me not to call you an idiot!" I exclaimed. I let him come inside.

"Where's our father?" Lewis asked, looking around. He had only a bag with him, a huge bag, and he threw it to the ground.

"He's…" I stared at him. He looked the same: his dark hair was a bit longer than it used to be, almost as long as Pony's and Soda's, and he was just a bit skinnier than he had been two years before, but his pale grey eyes were the same, he still eyed me like a big brother eyes his little sister… "He's in Oklahoma City, he's got a court case, you know…but he'll come back tomorrow. At night, probably. Lewis…" I sighed. "Where have you been? Two years…why you never came back at least for holidays? Why you never wrote?"

"It's…" he paused. "It's difficult to explain. I've been travelling a lot…I've been to Texas, Arizona, California…New York, too…"

"New York?" I almost yelled. "That's incredibly far away! And New York is huge, it's a dangerous city-"

"Like Tulsa." He cut me off. "Tulsa's dangerous, too. Some parts of it, that is. Don't tell me the East Side at night is safe."

I didn't reply. The East Side…Soda…Pony, Darry, Steve and Two-Bit…they lived there. "Well, it depends-"

"You know I'm right, Sybil." He yawned. "Listen…I'm tired, why don't we just go to bed and talk… tomorrow?"

I nodded, even if I was suddenly feeling very awake. "Ok…"

Lewis patted me on the head, like he used to do years before, and went upstairs. I wanted to call Soda and tell him Lewis was home so badly, but I couldn't, it was one in the morning. I had to wait. Then I thought about the following morning, when I would tell Lewis I had a boyfriend (and a real amazing one at that), I'd tell him I was doing great in school, I'd tell him what I had done in those two years while he was away, how me and dad had managed to stand mom's loss and his loss, too, since for all we knew he could be hurt or worse…

I shuddered at the thought and decided I'd go to bed, too. It was about time.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So, you left your job in Phoenix and headed north…and reached New York?"

"Yeah."

"What did you do there? How long did you stay?"

"Actually, I don't like thinking about it. New York was a nice place, but it was lonely, too."

I could feel the sadness in my brother's voice. We were sitting at the kitchen table and he was telling me about those two years he had lived around the States. Well, he wasn't telling me much: he was trying to avoid my questions and kept on eating so he could excuse himself saying his mouth "was full".

"Look, Sybil…" he sighed. "I'd prefer not to talk about these two years. For the most part I thought I was in hell, it was awful…"

"Why didn't you come back then?" I whispered. Why had he chosen to live like a runaway rather than stay with his own family?

"Because you know our father and I don't really get along. I didn't want to ask for his help for some business…I needed to manage things on my own. I've come back now because I've taken care of that business and I feel like I can live here again. Actually, not really here, in this house: I plan on renting some place, because I wanna live alone. I don't wanna live with…" his voice trailed off.

"Why, Lewis? Why can't you try to get along with dad? He loves you, he loves you despite everything you've ever done, he loves you even though the two of you fight all the time! Listen…first mom, then you… it almost killed him…" I looked down. "And me, too."

"I didn't think you'd suffer like that, Sybil…if I had known, I would have called…"

"What?" I cried. "You're my brother! How could you think I wouldn't worry about you? How could you think I wouldn't miss you?"

He seemed oblivious to the matter. "Listen, I'm sorry, Sybil, real sorry, but I want you to understand this…" he paused. "I never left before because of you and mom. When she died…reality hit me hard and I understood things would never change."

He got up and left the room. I glanced at the clock and hurried up, or else I'd be late for school.

"Lewis, if you need the car to go around while I'm in school, you'll have to drive me!" I shouted.

"Yeah, hold on a sec, I'm coming."

He drove me to school and as I entered the building I bumped into Julian: "Hey, Sybil! You look…dazed…"

"Well, I guess…it's because my brother came home last night."

"Really? That's cool! Sophie told me you had received a letter from him…well…is he alright?"

"Yeah…I'll talk to you later, Julian…"

Truth was, I needed time to think after what my brother had told me. So he wanted to find some place to live in, on his own, and make a living, on his own, but how could he do that so easily? He needed lots of money just to rent some small flat and get some furniture; besides, it's not like finding a job where he could earn a good amount of money was that easy, since he didn't have a degree, but just his high school certificate. Also, what if…

"Hey, Sybil."

I looked up: "Seth, leave me alone."

He ignored my remark. "What are you thinking about?"

"Not your business." I coldly replied.

"You know, you're even prettier than usual today." he grinned. I pretended I hadn't heard anything. "What did you do last night?"

"Once again, not your business. Leave me alone, I don't like you one bit. You think I forgot what you did to Pony?"

His smile faded away. "He's a Greaser, I can't help it if I don't like his kind."

"I can't help it if I don't like you. Why won't you leave me alone?" I asked, once again.

"Because I like you too much."

I decided I'd ignore him, since nothing I said was working. "Whatever."

"If you dated me, I'd stop harassing that Greaser. There's nothing more annoying than the kind of them. They're just dirty little folks that think they're worth something. Well, they aren't, and they'd better realize it before it's too late. Cause I mean…"

Seth kept on rambling and insulting the Greasers, till Mrs. Hindley entered the classroom and greeted everyone. I was really thankful for her presence. Seth would shut up then. The big drawback was that I wasn't in the right mood for a hour of history (even though I liked the subject, it was eight in the morning and I had only slept six hours or something the past night). I sighed and wished that endless school day would go by quickly.

But of course, it didn't. It was one of the slowest days of my whole life. I was anxious to get home and see dad and tell him about the good news and see dad and Lewis talk. If only I had imagined what was going to happen, I would never have wished for such a thing.

Dad and Lewis fought badly, so badly I don't even like to think about it and remember the details of their conversation. One moment they were there, chatting quietly, and the next they were almost jumping at each other's throats. Lewis soon got tired of yelling and left, slamming the front door. I ran after him, since he was walking fast, but he said he wanted to be alone and I had no choice but go back home. Dad was still sitting at the kitchen's table, looking pale and tired, and I felt bad for him. It was obvious he didn't feel like talking, so I kissed him goodnight and went to bed. I had nightmares and I woke up in a bad mood, also because I found out Lewis hadn't come home since last night and I had a very important, very difficult math exam that same day, at school. I wanted to skip it, but I didn't want to ask dad his permission, since I didn't want him to get madder than he probably still was from last night, so I went to school, did the exam, waited patiently for the classes to finish and then drove to the DX station, to see Soda. I desperately needed to talk to him, he was the only one who could help me feel a bit better.

"Hey, Steve…I was looking for Soda…" I smiled at my boyfriend's best buddy. He didn't smile back, but replied: "He's at home today."

"Why? Is he okay?" I immediately started worrying.

"Sure, he's fine, just asked for a day off. He works a lot and he's worn-out these days, but I guess you can't understand that, since you go to school, have a easy life and everything."

I felt something inside ache. "Steve, I don't…"

"Go find Soda." He muttered. He obviously wasn't in a good mood. Well, I wasn't, either, and I was tired too. But of course I reached the Curtises' house. I knocked and waited, till Two-Bit opened the door.

"Hi, beauty queen! How are you doing?"

I smiled at his welcome. "Fine, thanks, what about you?"

"Always doing great!" he grinned and let me in. "Bet you're looking for Soda. I don't know why every girl thinks he's so attractive. I mean, we could be twins, if it wasn't for my sideburns."

He raised an eyebrow and I laughed. Bitterly, though. I was still thinking about Lewis.

"Hi, Sybil!" Soda reached us and kissed my right cheek, really close to my mouth. "Just ignore Two-Bit, he's more annoying than usual today."

"What? Sodapop Curtis, I'll never help you tidy your house again!"

"When did you ever do that?"

Two-Bit started thinking. Soda dragged me away from the room before Two-Bit could add something. Soda led me to another room, then closed the door. I looked around and guessed it was his bedroom. Then I heard the TV from the living room, Two-Bit was probably watching something, but before I could ask Soda where Ponyboy was, he started kissing me like there was no tomorrow. I was too nervous to enjoy it, though. I pulled away.

"What's wrong?" Soda asked. "Have I done something-"

"No, Soda, it's not you!" I cut him off. "I just need to talk to you, because I'm feeling awful…"

"Why is that?" his stunning eyes were staring into mine. He looked worried.

"My brother came home. I was happy at first, but…but he and dad got into a huge fight, then Lewis left slamming the door…he didn't come back last night…I don't know why they have to fight like that, but I don't want Lewis to leave again…" I explained, fighting back tears.

Soda hugged me and held me in his arms, running his fingers through my hair. "I'm sure everything will work out."

"What if it doesn't?"

"If your brother is half as amazing as you are, things will work. You have to be optimistic, because it really helps, you know?" he grinned so crazily I ended up grinning, too. Still holding him, I replied: "Thanks, Soda…I didn't mean to come here and bother you, especially since today you were having some rest…"

"You didn't bother me none! Actually…I wanted to see you so bad…" his smile faded away. "Bad news though…I'm busy Saturday night, so I was wondering if you don't mind if we go out on Sunday…"

"Sure, I don't mind…" I guessed he was probably busy working. And I guessed wrong.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On Sunday, I was waiting for Soda to come and pick me up. I told him he didn't need to do that: if he came by, he'd have to meet my father, but he had insisted, and I thought my father probably would like to know the boy I was going out with. Lewis had packed his stuff and went to stay at his best friend's house for a while, till he found some place he could rent. When I had asked him how he was going to find the money he needed, he told me not to worry about that. Of course, that only made me worry more.

"Dad, don't ask Soda stupid questions, alright? Don't ask him about his parents, cause they passed away some years ago, and don't ask him-"

"Sybil, I'm not going to question him like I do with witnesses on trial."

"Never mind. I know lawyers like to hear themselves talk." I replied. I was nervous because I was afraid my father would end up talking too much.

The doorbell rang. I glanced one last time at my father, told him to wait in the living room and went to open the door. "Hey, Soda!"

"Hi, Sybil!"

I let him come in and noticed he had a bruise on his left cheek. "What happened?"

"Oh, you mean this?" he pointed at his face. "Nothing much. I just…Steve and me were fighting… playfully, of course…but I ended up being punched for real. It's okay, though."

I stared at him. "If you are sure…" I couldn't help but notice he was still incredibly attractive, even with a bruise on his left cheek, even with some old worn-out jeans, even with lots of hair grease on.

"So you're Sodapop Curtis?"

I almost jumped. "Dad! I told you to wait in the living room!"

"I know, but I was curious to meet Sodapop." He looked at him and smiled. "Sybil talks about you all the time. Nice to meet you."

They shook each other's hands, while Soda said "Nice to meet you, too, Mr. Forrester." He grinned and dad couldn't help but grin, too. Soda was like that. He made you grin in spite of yourself.

"Well, Sybil wasn't lying…you really look like some movie star!"

I blushed. "Dad!"

"It's the truth, isn't it?" he smiled at Soda. "What's your age again, Sodapop?"

"I'm eighteen, Mr. Forrester."

"Do you want something to put on that?" he pointed at Soda's cheek.

Soda shook his head. "No, thank you, sir."

"Well, I suppose you have to go now…Sybil, don't come home too late, alright?"

"Don't worry, dad!"

He smiled one last time at Soda and me. "Have a good time!"

"Thanks."

As soon as we got into his car, I turned to Soda: "Sorry about dad..."

"Why should you be sorry?"

"Because he wouldn't wait in the living room for us to go and greet him and also because he always talks too much."

Soda started to laugh. "Why are you laughing?" I asked. I didn't understand.

"Because…Sybil, you worry about nothing. Your father has been extremely nice to me, more than any other adult who doesn't live in the East Side has ever been. You know what Socs and middle class people think about Greasers…don't look at me like that, you know it…and your father…treated me like I was no Greaser, no hood."

"You're no hood." I felt guilty, because I perfectly remembered those days when I used to think all Greasers were rubbish and they were worth nothing. I knew better now, even if I knew some of them weren't nice people. But even some Socs and some middle class boys weren't nice. So where was the big difference?

Soda and I went watching some races. He told me he used to ride in rodeos, but he had to quit after he tore a ligament. While we were there, we met Steve and his girlfriend Evie, too, so we all sat together. Steve had a couple of bruises, so I thought Soda had hit him too hard when they were playfully fighting.

"How long have you and Soda been going out?" Evie asked me. Sodapop and Steve had gone taking drinks.

"It's not much…not even a month, actually." I couldn't help but notice she had tons of make-up on. Her hair was blonde, but it looked dyed to me.

"It's nice to see he's finally gotten over Sandy." Evie said.

"Sandy?" I repeated.

"Yes, his previous girlfriend…didn't he tell you about her?"

No, he didn't. He had told me he had been hurt badly in the past, but he never mentioned this girl. I told Evie, and she smiled. "Well, I guess it still hurts. But don't worry, I'm sure he likes you about as much as he did with Sandy." She then turned to Steve, who had come back with cokes and was sitting next to her, and kissed him. Soda sat next to me, grinned and kissed me, too.

I was suddenly feeling anxious. Evie hadn't certainly made me feel that "tuff", like Greasers said.

I guess Soda noticed I was acting weird, but he was real nice with me all afternoon and evening. He drove me home just after dinner, since the following day was Monday and I had to go to school.

"Hey…I'll phone you, okay?" he promised, as I got off the car.

"Sure…Soda…" I wanted to ask him about Sandy so bad.

"Yeah?"

"I…I think you should put something on your cheek." I didn't feel like asking about his previous girlfriend. If he hadn't told me about her, he definitely had had his reasons. I trusted him and that was all that mattered.

"Okay, if you say so." He replied cheerfully. "Goodnight, Sybil." We kissed one last time, then I watched him drive away. I sighed and entered my house. "Dad, I'm back!"

"Oh, hello, Sybil. Did you have fun?" my dad smiled at me, closing the book he was reading.

I nodded. "Have you heard…from-"

"Lewis didn't call or anything." Dad got up. "I'm afraid he's serious when he says he doesn't want to live here anymore. Now, don't feel bad, Sybil…he loves you and cares about you, but…only you, not me, and he can't live with me. He can't stand it, so…I guess you just have to get used to the idea."

"But dad…we're a family, why can't we…"

"Because Lewis's grown up now. He doesn't need his family anymore. At least, he doesn't think so."

I smiled weakly. "Well, it's been only us for two years. I guess we can still make it, right?"

My father hugged me. "Yes, we can." He pulled away: "You can see Lewis everytime, still. You know it."

"Yes." I knew it. I also knew it wasn't the same as having my brother living under the same roof, though. But it wasn't dad's fault.

I didn't sleep very well that night. First that Sandy girl, then Lewis again…

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Didn't you sleep well last night, Sybil?" Seth's annoying voice made me turn around, slamming my locker. "Seth, why don't you-" my voice trailed off. He had a black eye and his lips were swollen. "What did you do to yourself?"

"Guess what! Your dear boyfriend hit me. In a rumble, Saturday night." Saturday night…Soda had told me he was busy Saturday night. Why hadn't he told me about the rumble? "Sodapop, that's his name, right? It's ridiculous. His parents weren't right in their heads. I don't know if the worst name is Sodapop or Ponyboy, though. They both suck. But…I have to admit he doesn't look like a Greaser much. That's probably why you like him…anyways, we had this huge fight and this is the result. There were his brothers, too, and other friends of them. Fabian's hurt pretty bad, too, and the other friends of us."

I smirked. "Serves you right."

He glared at me. "Sybil, you don't know how violent Greasers are. They like picking fights just for fun. Look at me."

"Soda's got a bruise on his beautiful face, too. That's a shame, but it'll go away soon. Your face…well, you look better with a black eye." I ironically said. But Seth didn't find it funny. He kept glaring at me and I could tell he felt like hitting me. But he didn't. Instead, he went on speaking: "I've found out something about him that should be of your concern."

"Really?" I looked away, bored, as I started walking down the school corridor.

"Don't know if he told you about his past girlfriend, I think her name's Sandy or something like that…"

I listened. At least he got her name right.

"Well, she had to leave for Florida..."

"So?" I snapped at him.

"…because she was pregnant."


	11. Sandy

Hey everyone! What's up? I saw _Crash_ (with Matt Dillon) a couple of nights ago and I loved it! Really an awesome movie, so I suggest you check it out if you haven't already!

Thanks to **Jamea** (you hate Seth that much?Lol!), **Tonyboy** (don't feel bad for that review, it was a long time ago) and **Erika** for reviewing!

**11 - Sandy**

Seth's words echoed in my mind for what seemed like eternity. _She was pregnant._ Soda's girlfriend. The one who had hurt him? Left for Florida. She was carrying a baby. Soda's baby? Soda had knocked up Sandy or whatever her name was. Maybe.

Seth was staring at me, true concern showing on his face. "I didn't mean to tell you like that, Sybil, but you left me no choice. I just want you to understand what kind of guy that Curtis is."

"Why should I believe you?" my voice sounded miles far away. I spoke those words before I knew it.

"Ask him if you don't trust me. I'm sure if you're really important for him, he will tell you about his ex girlfriend…mother of his child. I think the kid should be about one year old now…no, maybe less…"

Before walking away, Seth added: "I'll be around if you need me, Sybil."

I was feeling weak. And I couldn't think straight. I was hoping Seth was lying, I actually wanted him to lie to me. But he had told me about the rumble; Sodapop hadn't. What was I going to do? Ditch school was out of the question. But maybe I could. Maybe I should. I wouldn't pay much attention even if I stayed. But my father would kill me if he ever found out. Besides, with Lewis and the way he was acting, I didn't want my father to worry anymore than he needed to.

But I had to see Sodapop. I would go crazy if I didn't.

I left the school building. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to drive, since I was kind of oblivious to everything around me. I almost hit a car before I finally reached the DX station.

Soda welcomed me with a big grin. "Hi, Sybil! How come you aren't at school? Not that I mind seeing you…" He stopped talking because he noticed I wasn't smiling at all. "What's the matter? Something bad happened to you?"

"Soda…what…what happened between you and your ex girlfriend?"

"What?" he looked startled. "Why are you asking me?"

I didn't answer. Soda stared at me. "Maybe we should talk about this…later…"

"Just…just tell me it's not true…that your girlfriend…got pregnant and left…" I whispered. I needed to know the truth or I'd lose my mind.

Soda looked like he didn't know what to say. "Who told you? What…how-"

"Just tell me the truth, Soda…"

He lowered his voice, since there were a couple of customers around: "It's true, she was pregnant. But it wasn't me…the child wasn't mine, Sybil..." he sighed. "I loved Sandy, and I wanted to marry her, even when she confessed I wasn't the father of the baby she was carrying, but I guess…she didn't love me, because she preferred to leave…"

I was feeling dizzy. "You wanted to marry her?"

Soda nodded. "I loved her." He repeated. "It was so awful…she left and wouldn't talk to me again. She never phoned, and she never replied to any of the letters I wrote…I wrote so many letters, telling her how much I missed her and how life was like here without her, but she ignored me. I got all those letters back."

Soda and I were standing in a corner, away from the people stopping at the DX. He didn't look like he cared about them, probably because he wasn't working alone and he could talk to me without getting scolded.

"What if the baby was yours…and she lied?" I asked. My voice sounded strange to me. High-pitched.

"Even if she did, she would have told me the truth by now. But I never heard anything from her since she left. It's been more than one year now. I know her, Sybil…no, actually…I thought I knew her. I never thought she could betray me, I never thought she could…" his voice trailed off.

"And you loved her." I whispered. "Do you still love her?"

Soda didn't answer at first. He looked around, like he wanted to make sure no one was listening to us, and then he shook his head. "No. I've been heart-broken too much, and I've been wanting to let go of Sandy for months. But I could never do that…till I met you. Sybil…look at me." He put his hand on my chin and lifted my head, so that I had to stare into his beautiful eyes. "I never…never, ever…wanted to lie to you…but I didn't find it right to tell you about Sandy right after we started going out…because you may have thought I wasn't being serious with you…"

I knew what he meant. So I didn't say anything and he went on. "…I don't want you to think that. I like you a lot…I wish I could say I love you, but it's too soon. If you let me, though…I'm sure someday I will."

"Are you sure I'm not…just…some replacement?" I asked. I was feeling hurt and insecure.

"No. You ain't no replacement. I can tell you everything you wanna hear, but…you have to believe me. All the girls you've seen here, come by only because they like flirting, but they'd never date me, because I'm just some stupid high-school drop-out who puts too much grease in his hair." He slowly said. "You're different. You've always treated me differently. You're beautiful and smart, you're too much for me, I already told you before we started dating…because I knew you deserved better…"

"Soda." It hurt to pronounce his name and I didn't know why. "You're not some stupid high-school drop-out. And I'm not as special as you make me out to be…"

"So…you ain't mad at me?"

"No…but I need to think…I need some time alone… to think."

Soda was staring at me as I left the DX station. I didn't know what to do. I was feeling lonely and miserable. Normally I would talk to my father, who was always there when I needed him, but I couldn't go and tell him something like that. I couldn't talk to Sophie, either: she'd say she had been right about Greasers all along that they were all the same, and all that rubbish. So I drove to Owen's house.

Owen Reynolds was Lewis's best friend. They were the same age and used to go to school together, till Lewis had run away. After the fight with dad, Lewis had gone to stay at Owen's for a while. Owen knew me, of course, so when he opened the door and saw me standing there, he welcomed me and told me to go inside.

"I was looking for Lewis…" I explained, following Owen.

"He should come back soon, he went out to buy some stuff…I convinced my parents to let him stay here with us till he finds some place to live in." Owen was an only child and in my opinion he was very spoilt. "Are you alright, Sybil? You look…"

I cut him off. "Yeah, I just need to talk to Lewis. Are you attending college, by the way?" I wanted to talk about something else.

"I'm attending the Tulsa Community College, and I don't have lessons everyday, so I decided to stay at home. Also because all my friends live in the neighbourhood and I can keep in touch with them more easily." He explained. I didn't really care, but I let him ramble on, till Lewis finally came home.

He was surprised to see me, but he eventually dragged me upstairs, so we could talk. He noticed I didn't look that great.

"What happened, Sybil?"

I couldn't help it. I started crying. Lewis had no choice but hold me till my tears would stop. And it took a long time. After I calmed down, I told him what I had found out about my boyfriend. He didn't even know I had a boyfriend, I hadn't told him when he had come home because he was the one who had done most talking. He listened patiently. When my speech was over, he looked deeply lost in his thoughts. Like he was pondering something extremely important. He didn't speak, though. He just held me, till it was time for me to go home.


	12. No one like him

Thank you _Jamea, Tonyboy, EmmaHermione1fan_ (I LOVED Goblet of Fire, I think it's brilliant! I'm probably going to see it once again because that's just how great that movie is! How did you like it?) and _Sodasgurl4ever_ for reviewing! Sorry if I haven't updated in a while, I've been busy with college!

**12 – No one like him**

On Sunday morning dad and I went to church, he sat with his acquaintances and I sat with Sophie, as usual. The priest welcomed us all, as usual, and the choir started to sing, as usual. Everything was the same as every other Sunday. But I was different. I hadn't seen Soda for almost a week and I was feeling different. Like a part of me was missing.

Sophie elbowed me. "You've been avoiding me lately, what's the matter?" she whispered.

"Nothing…" I muttered. Sophie stared at me like I was nuts, so I had to admit: "Okay, there's something, but honestly, Sophie, I'd rather not talk about it…I don't feel like chatting." I muttered.

Sophie nodded. I could tell she was mad at me, though: she was my best friend and we had always told each other everything, every stupid little thing ever happened to us during the thirteen years of our friendship. That is…until Soda and I got together. After that, I had started talking less to Sophie and I had started feeling more uncomfortable around her, because she didn't understand. She couldn't understand why I liked Soda that much. Julian, her boyfriend, was completely different: he belonged to the middle class, like us, and he was a very ordinary guy, not much different from everyone: he didn't stand out in the crowd. He was nice and everything, but he wasn't special. I never understood why Sophie liked him that much. But maybe when we fall in love…each one of us tends to think our crush is special and other people are plain ordinary.

I didn't pay much attention during the priest's sermon. I wanted to, but I hadn't slept well and Mr. Glass' voice made me feel even tireder. As dad drove home, he asked me if I was feeling alright. I lied and said yes. I said I was going to Sophie's house in the afternoon, since lately we hadn't spent much time together because of me going out with Sodapop.

Of course, that was another lie. In the afternoon I was going to see Lewis. I didn't want to tell dad because it didn't feel right, to me, that I could see my brother and dad couldn't see his son. Every night, before falling asleep, I prayed for dad and for my brother. Lewis wouldn't listen to me, but maybe God would make him understand he didn't have to act like he was always right about everything. Maybe God would make him understand he and dad weren't so different, after all.

"Hi, Sybil!"

"Hi, Lewis…" We sat at a small table in some café and ordered something to drink. "How are you? Have you found some job?" I asked him then.

"I'm okay, and no, I haven't found anything yet…enough about me. How do you feel?"

"Fine."

Lewis kept staring at me till I gave up: "Okay, I'm lying, I don't feel well at all, I miss Soda and I wanna see him so bad I think I could die anytime now." I admitted.

"So why don't you tell him?"

"What?"

"That you miss him, so you can go back together. In my opinion…well, you can't be sure the kid isn't his, but if you like him so much and you trust him, you should stick to his words…and time will tell."

"I thought you'd tell me I should leave him alone and that he's not good enough for me…" I was astonished. Lewis was the kind of guy who never acts nice toward people unless he knows them. But he was speaking in favor of Soda now. I hadn't told Lewis my boyfriend was a Greaser, though. If Lewis knew, he'd probably tell me I should break up with him.

"Because I want you to be happy and it doesn't look like you'll be if you don't get back together with your boyfriend…Soda. Weird name…"

"I know, it's so unique!" I smiled. "You should see him, Lewis…Soda's real handsome, every girl falls for him, but he's not a playboy or anything like that…he's funny, cute, nice, he's…" I started rambling about Sodapop. After a while, Lewis laughed. "Why are you still here? Go talk to him!"

"Now?" I didn't feel ready.

"Yeah! What are you waiting for?"

"Alright, I'm going…but…I should go home and change clothes, maybe…"

Lewis sighed. "Do you want me to drive you?"

"No…I came by bike, remember? I'll just go home now…change into some nice clothes…and then I'll go look for Soda…" I pondered out loud.

My brother smiled. "I'll see you soon."

I smiled back and hurried outside. My house wasn't far away and it took me only five minutes to get there by bike. Dad was out, so I didn't have to explain anything and quickly changed clothes, put some perfume on and ran downstairs. I closed the front door and started locking it…

"Sybil?"

I turned to see who it was. And I felt something inside melt. "Soda…"

"I'm sorry…" he simply said. He was standing near the gate, which was obviously closed. I reached him and tried to smile, but failed miserably. Soda started to talk. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Sybil, but I didn't feel like telling you about Sandy because…she's my past. I don't like thinking about my past… but I truly hope my future will be with you."

He sounded so romantic…a tear fell down my cheek. "I shouldn't have gotten so mad at you, Soda…you know…I shouldn't have listened to Seth…"

"What?"

"He told me about Sandy…and he said you got her pregnant…but since he's an idiot, I shouldn't have paid attention to him…I'm sorry…"

Soda made a face. "I guess he wanted revenge after the rumble, since he got it pretty bad."

"Why didn't you tell me about the rumble? If you had…I would have understood…"

"Are you sure?" Soda eyed me carefully.

"Well…maybe not… But from now on, we really must be honest with each other…okay?"

Soda nodded slowly. "I guess…I need to tell you something else."

I took his hand: "Let's go inside."

We sat in the living room and Soda started to tell me about two of his best buddies, Johnny Cade and Dallas Winston, who had died the previous year. He told me about Ponyboy and Johnny running away because of that Soc who got killed, about Dallas helping them, about Johnny dying because of the injuries he got after he and Ponyboy had rescued some children from a church on fire, and about Dallas dying because he couldn't stand anything anymore after Johnny's death.

When he finished speaking, I felt like I knew Dallas, a seventeen year old guy hardened beyond caring, and Johnny, a sixteen year old kid who looked younger than his age, afraid of his own shadow. And I felt sad, extremely sad, because those kids didn't deserve to end up like that. It wasn't their fault they had grown up on the wrong side of the town, it wasn't their fault they had horrible parents, it wasn't their fault life had been so harsh on them.

"I told you about Johnny and Dally, Sybil, because…those days were also the days when Sandy left and so it was even harder, for me, to face that situation…than it was for Darry or for Two-Bit or for Steve…"

I couldn't imagine Soda's pain. I told him and I said I was sorry, that he didn't deserve to suffer like that. He managed to grin: "Let's don't be sad. I'm happy now you're with me…"

I could tell he was up to something. "What are you thinking about?"

"Do you have plans for this afternoon?"

"No, why?"

"Come with me, then!"

Before I knew it, Soda and I were standing in some huge room filled with people who were dancing happily. I turned to Soda to ask where we were, but he just took my hands and exclaimed: "Come on, let's dance!"

"What? Soda, you're crazy, I can't dance!" I replied.

"Everyone can dance. And this is country music, what do you worry about?"

He was right. Country music was being played and everyone was dancing in a funny way. I figured I could do that, too, even if I felt so embarrassed. But Soda just grinned and helped me. He was amazing. There was no one like him, that was for sure.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Even if Soda and I had talked and I had decided it didn't really matter he hadn't told me about his ex girlfriend, I still couldn't help but think about her sometimes. I thought Soda should have loved her a lot and I wondered if he'd ever love me the same way. I thought that was beyond my understanding how that girl could have betrayed someone like Sodapop. I wasn't mad at her or anything; I actually felt sorry for her, since she had gotten pregnant and had had to leave. I wondered what would happen if she came back with the baby and asked Soda to forgive her and get back together, because she loved him deeply. I wondered…

"Sybil?"

I looked up: "Did you say something?"

"No, I was just staring at your beautiful face…" I grinned at Soda's words. "And I couldn't help but notice you seem lost in your thoughts…" he added.

"I was just…" It wasn't right to bring up the Sandy topic. It would only make him feel bad. "…thinking… about my best friend's suggestion…"

Soda listened to me, so I went on: "You saw her once, her name's Sophie, remember? Well, she said we could go out together…you, me, Sophie and her boyfriend…I'm not so sure about it, though…"

"You want us to go out all together?" Soda asked.

"Maybe…" I mumbled. I didn't want to annoy Soda.

"Let's go out together then!" he grinned. "You've met my friends, why shouldn't I meet yours?"

"Really?" I asked. Soda nodded and I hugged him. "You're the best, Soda!"

"Because you don't know me." Someone ironically said. I looked up. "Hi, Two-Bit!"

"Hi, Sybil! How are you doing?" Two-Bit grabbed a bottle of beer and sat in front of Sodapop and me. We were in the Curtis' living room and before Two-Bit had entered the room, Soda and I had had the whole house to ourselves. Darrel was at work and Ponyboy was practicing for track runs at school.

"I'm great, thanks! What about you?"

"Okay. Wanna drink some?" he showed me the bottle.

Soda rolled his eyes. "Two-Bit, are you drunk already?"

"I'm always drunk, Sodapop Patrick Curtis! You should know by now!"

"Patrick?" I piped up. "Your middle name's Patrick?"

Soda made a face. "Yeah…I know it's not tuff at all…"

"Oh, I love it!" I grinned. "I've always liked the name Patrick!"

Soda grinned too. "Really?"

"Really…"

We kissed and Two-Bit cocked an eyebrow. "Let's play a game."

"What kind of a game?"

"You have to guess what Darry's and Pony's middle names are."

"What? I'll never guess! It's impossible…" I protested, before Soda intervened: "Two-Bit, you're getting annoying. Watch Mickey Mouse."

"Alright. What are _you_ going to do?"

"I'm home!" Ponyboy announced slamming the front door. "Hey everyone…hey, Sybil!"

"Hi, Pony!" I smiled at him. He was a real cute kid. Of course, he was Soda's brother. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure…" Despite his answer, Ponyboy looked doubtful.

"What's your middle name?"

"Huh…Michael. Why?"

"Ponyboy Michael…how cute! It suits you!" Ponyboy's ears reddened. "I only asked because Two-Bit wanted me to guess yours and Darry's middle name."

"I don't think Darry would want anyone to know his middle name, Two-Bit…" Pony said. Two-Bit ignored him, because he was focused on watching Mickey Mouse on TV.

I wanted to know what it was, but Soda and Pony wouldn't tell me unless I told them mine. So I did. "Iris."

"Iris?" Ponyboy repeated.

"I bet it was your mother's name." Sodapop grinned.

I looked at him: "How did you know? I mean, yeah, that's my…that was my mother's name…"

"I could just tell. I can read people's mind, actually…"

"Can you? What am I thinking right now?" I giggled.

"You're thinking…Sodapop Curtis is the greatest guy in the whole world…" he joked.

"You're a true wizard."

Soda and I kept on chatting, while Ponyboy and Two-Bit watched Mickey Mouse on TV. I spent a real great afternoon. But when Soda drove me home, I was welcomed by a phone call of Lewis. Dad wasn't home. If he were, and if he had answered, I'm sure Lewis would have hung up.

"What's up, Lewis? Have you found a job?" I asked my brother.

"Yes, I have!" he sounded happy. "Why don't you come on over? We can have dinner together, when I'm finished here…"

I glanced at the clock. "Okay, I'll tell dad and then I'll come…what time should I be…wherever you're working?"

Lewis told me the place he was working in and the time I should reach him. Later, I said goodbye to my father and left.

Lewis was working in Tulsa's biggest mall; more precisely, he was working in some huge shop which sold both men and women clothes. He had to look after the men's ones, obviously.

"Hey, Lewis!" I greeted my brother. "How are you doing?"

"I'm okay! Do you wanna buy something?"

"No…not today. Listen, Thanksgiving is in a couple of weeks…will you come home? Dad and me, we would be happy to celebrate with you…" I said, looking at him.

"Sybil, you'd be happy to celebrate with me. Dad wouldn't be."

"But Lewis…"

"You know I'm right. Hey, do you know Seth? He works here too."

I turned around and saw Seth Tucker, staring at me with a huge grin plastered on his face.


	13. Thanksgiving

**13 - Thanksgiving**

"I don't like this Thanksgiving at all." I muttered under my breath, glaring at Seth.

"Come on, Sybil, you should at least pretend you're having fun." He suggested, grinning.

"Leave me alone. You've ruined everything. I wanted to spend the day with Soda and I can't. I wanted to spend it with my father and my brother, but I have to stay with you and Lewis, instead."

I was really mad: after that day when I had found out Seth worked in the same store as my brother, Lewis had started telling me Seth was a cool guy and really fun to spend time with, and when I had told him Seth wasn't a good guy at all, my brother wouldn't pay any attention to me. Then, dad had received an urgent call from Oklahoma City and he had had to leave a couple of days before Thanksgiving: he phoned and told me he wouldn't make it back in time to celebrate, so he suggested I spent it with my brother in the flat he had rented.

The only trouble was, Seth had suddenly reached us that day. Lewis had told him I would be there and he could come over if he wanted to, because it was just the two of us.

"What are you talking about?" Lewis entered the room with a couple of beer cans in his hands.

"What are you doing?" I replied. "Why are you carrying those beers?"

"Because we've already finished lunch and I'm thirsty."

"I understand that, I just don't see why you should drink beer."

"Do you want some?" he offered me one.

"Of course not! I'm seventeen!"

"Who cares, Sybil? It's not like we're getting drunk!" Seth smiled and took one beer.

"Shut up."

"Why are you in a bad mood, little sister?"

"Are you kidding, Lewis? If I had known Seth were here I never would have come! I would have spent the whole day with Soda! Or Sophie, anyway…not with you two!"

"No one said you have to spend the whole day with us…just lunch…"

"I can go then!" I got up and smiled.

"Not yet. I have the feeling you're spending too much time with that Soda guy. What kind of name is Sodapop?" Lewis insisted.

"It's a very original name and I like it!"

"Yeah, I bet it's so original no one else is called like that." Seth piped up.

"Shut your mouth." I glared at him. "And I'm not spending too much time with Soda. We haven't spent any time together at all lately, because of his full-time job, because of my part-time job and because of school. So I'm leaving now."

Lewis sighed. "Alright. Take care, Sybil."

"Don't worry about me."

I left, feeling truly happy. Seth was really getting on my nerves. What was he hoping for? That if he got friends with my brother, I'd start to like him too? I would never do that.

As I drove toward the East Side of town, I felt worried. What if Seth told my brother nonsense about Soda? He could tell him so much rubbish to make Soda look bad. Or worse.

I knocked before entering the Curtis' house, but there was no need to, because Darry saw me immediately and reached me, opening the door. "Hi, Darry…happy Thanksgiving!"

"Thanks, you too…Soda isn't home…he went out with Steve."

"I see…" I nodded. I felt upset all of a sudden. I really wanted to see Soda.

"Don't make that face…as soon as he comes back I'll tell him to call you, okay?"

"Okay…thank you."

Darry and I said goodbye to each other and I went back home, where I got bored in less than half an hour. I wanted Soda to call. But since I just sat on the sofa waiting, I fell asleep.

When I woke up, it was dinner time. I wasn't hungry, though, and I didn't want to get up, since I was still feeling sleepy…but I was cold and I decided I'd go back to sleep in my room. Before I could go upstairs, however, the doorbell rang. I muttered under my breath and went to see who it was.

The day started to get better, when I opened the door: "Soda! I wanted to see you so bad!"

I hugged him and I could tell he was grinning: "That's great to know, 'cause I wanted to see you too!"

I let him come inside and asked him if he had eaten. "No, I thought I'd pay a visit to you first…since we haven't seen each other much lately and Darry told me you had come over. I'm sorry I was out of town with Steve…"

I didn't ask why, I didn't care. I only cared about him. And I thought of something. "I could cook for you if you want to…"

"Really?" Soda's eyes kind of sparkled. "Would you?"

"Sure I would! I have yet to eat, too! Why don't you phone your brothers to tell them you're staying here?"

Soda did that and I started preparing dinner. It made me nervous that he was watching, because I was afraid I could get something wrong and make it taste awful.

"Don't look at me like that, Soda!"

"Why?"

"Because…I feel…" I couldn't finish the sentence cause Soda had gotten up and was kissing me. I kissed him back and it took a lot for us to pull away…man, Soda was definitely a stunning kisser. And we actually didn't do much after dinner: Soda told me the turkey tasted perfect and we spent all the time on the sofa, kissing.

"What time is it?" Soda pulled away from me to look at the clock.

"Almost eleven…" I answered.

"Maybe I should go…"

"Already?"

He looked at me. "I could stay for a while…if you ain't tired."

Of course I wasn't, I had slept the whole afternoon. "No, I'm not. You do realize you're the most handsome person on earth?"

"Really?"

"Yeah…and also the one with the most beautiful smile…"

"Thank you, Miss Forrester…" he joked. "You're the most beautiful person in the whole universe, you know that?"

I grinned. "Thank you, Mr. Curtis…"

The phone rang. I wanted to ignore the call, but Soda told me I'd better pick it up, so I did. It was my father, who wanted to know if everything was okay and how I had spent Thanksgiving. I didn't say anything about Seth, because I still hadn't told Soda, and I wanted it to stay that way.

When I said goodbye to dad on the phone, Soda got up: "I better go, Sybil…"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah…I'll see you soon anyway, since you don't have school for a couple of days…"

I nodded. "Are you working tomorrow?"

"Only in the morning, the boss said I could have half a day free since it's around Thanksgiving. We could go somewhere."

"Definitely." I kissed Soda's forehead and then frowned. "Soda, your forehead is hot…how do you feel?"

"What? I feel great!"

"Take care of yourself, I don't want you to get a temperature…"

"I won't."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The day which followed Thanksgiving, Soda was forced in bed by a huge temperature. Ponyboy phoned me to tell me and I decided to go over there, since I didn't have school. Ponyboy, too, was home.

"Hey, Soda…" I said softly. "What did I tell you last night?"

Soda managed to grin. "Aw, I don't feel that bad." He tried to get up but failed miserably.

"Stay in bed and rest!" I exclaimed. "Have you eaten something yet?"

"No, I'm not hungry…"

"Ponyboy and I'll cook something, okay? Now you sleep." I kissed his forehead. His cheeks were red and he was sweating and he looked adorable, like a little kid. He looked younger.

Ponyboy and I started to chat. I asked him if everything was alright with the three of them.

"Yeah…Darry was worried because Soda never gets sick, but I guess it had to happen once…so we know he's human." He grinned, and I thought he looked a lot like Soda that very moment.

"I could go get some medicines, maybe…" I pondered out loud. Ponyboy shook his head. "I think a day of rest will do. Sodapop's been working hard lately, maybe he got ill because he was tired."

"I see…I bet that's hard to work all day long when you're only eighteen…"

"Soda says it's a lot better than going to school. He hated school. He wanted to skip it so bad everyday, but he used to go because of mom and dad…they trusted him and he didn't want to make them mad." Pony explained.

I nodded. "What about you, Pony? Soda told me you have the higher grades…"

Ponyboy blushed. "No…well, I like school. Except chemistry…and math, I don't really like them, but I try. I prefer literature though."

"I don't like chemistry and math, either. Literature, instead…you get to read some really interesting things and you can learn a lot from books…even if the characters are unlike you."

He nodded. "What's your favorite book, Sybil?"

I thought for a while. "To kill a mockingbird…by Harper Lee. Have you read it?"

"No…" he shook his head. "I've heard it's a good novel, though…"

"You can borrow it from me. What's your favorite book, instead?"

"I don't have one really…there are many different novels I enjoy-"

The front door slammed and Ponyboy was cut off by Two-Bit who jumped on him. "Hey, Sybil!"

"Hi, Two-Bit…" I laughed, as Ponyboy struggled to kick his friend.

"I've heard Soda's sick…must be only an urban legend, right?" Two-Bit asked.

"No, he's really sick…he's got some temperature…but don't make too much noise, because he's sleeping… or trying to…right now."

"I can lend a hand with the cooking!" Two-Bit exclaimed enthusiastically. Ponyboy, who had gotten away from him now, rolled his eyes. "I saw that, Pony."

Two-Bit and Ponyboy started fighting again and I reached Soda. He was asleep. I sat next to him and watched him. He definitely looked younger.

I spent the whole day at the Curtises', till Darry came back and told me I could go home, that they would manage things on their own. He sounded a bit annoyed and I didn't understand why, but I left, feeling a bit disappointed, because I didn't know what I had done wrong.

To make things worse, when I got home, I found my father was mad because I had come home that late and I had spent the whole day at Soda's house. I tried to explain Soda was sick and I wanted to lend a hand, but he was so mad he wouldn't listen. He never got mad. I phoned my brother because I wanted to vent, but he wasn't home. I was very frustrated.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On Monday, at school, I wasn't able to pay much attention. Dad was still angry, Lewis was nowhere to be found, Soda hadn't called me. And my math teacher called me and told me my grades were slipping and I needed to improve. She suggested someone helped me. "I even know who…do you know Seth Tucker?"

"What?" I almost yelled. "Sorry…what did you say?"

"Seth Tucker…he could help you, he's got really good grades and he works hard. I'll tell him about this, I'm sure he'll be fine with it."

"But…do I have to? I mean, I can study on my own, I'm sure Seth has got better things to do anyway."

My teacher looked up. "We can ask him now. Seth, please, come here!"

Seth was walking by and heard the teacher calling out his name. When he saw me, he smiled and reached us.

"Sybil Forrester needs some help with my subject…would you lend her a hand?"

"Of course!" Seth smiled at me and I felt awful. I left the room and Seth followed me.

"So, Sybil, when do you want to start?"

"Never."

"Our dear teacher said you have to."

"Who cares about her. If I need any help, I'll ask…" I stopped talking. Soda probably couldn't help me. He hated school and he worked all the time, we barely spent some time together.

"You'll ask your boyfriend? I thought he was a dropout." Seth grinned, cause he knew he was right.

I didn't answer.

"You know you need help from me, Sybil."

"How can we study together when I can't stand your presence, Seth?"

"Hey, you don't even know me. I'm not that bad. If I act the way I do, it's because…" he lowered his voice. "I'm in love."

"Suuure." I sarcastically said. "You don't even know what love is."

"How do you know that? I wouldn't be spending this much time trying to get to you if I didn't care for real."

I sighed. "Whatever. Goodbye, Seth."

"See you soon, Sybil."


	14. Fighting

This chapter is actually quite short but I couldn't post the next part here, because…well, cliff-hangers exist for a reason. Lol. Anyway, even if this is not the best, happiest of chapters, 15th will be, so don't get too sad! I'm going to update on Thursday or Friday, I promise!

**14 - Fighting**

A month slowly went by: Seth and I used to study together twice a week, after school, for a couple of hours. We used to stay in an empty classroom at school, because I didn't want him to come over at my house, and, even if I hated that situation, I had to admit my grades had improved. Seth wasn't that stupid when it came down to math. And sometimes he could even be funny.

"Okay…last question for today…what am I supposed to do in this case?" I showed him some kind of equation. He proceeded to explain the way I should solve it. "So…are we done?"

"Yeah." I started gathering my things.

"How…are you doing better now?"

I took my time to answer. "Actually…yes, I'm doing a lot better and our dear teacher is finally happy."

"That's great to know." Seth smiled, a big smile, a real one. Nothing like the one he used to show when he was with his buddies. He became serious once again and asked: "Do you even realize how beautiful you are?"

"What?" I looked up from my textbook.

"You're the most attractive, nice and caring girl I've ever met…even if you don't like me… I can't help but stare at you all the time, when you're with your friends, with your classmates…"

I was startled. "Seth…you know I'm not going to go out with you, even if-"

"I'm not telling you to flatter you. I'm telling you because…I'm not sure if you understand how amazing you are. Well, you probably do, I bet your boyfriend tells you that all the time."

"I…" I didn't know what to say. "You…I mean…" I shook my head. "Nevermind…see you." I headed toward the exit, but I quickly turned: "Thanks." I said softly, so softly I didn't know if he had heard me. But he obviously had, because he smiled.

I felt confused. Seth had talked like he wasn't himself, like he was a different person. Then I understood that was another part of him…the hidden one, the one he couldn't show whenever he was with his friends, or at school, that had spoken.

I needed some gas for the car, so I drove till the DX. I wanted to see Soda. When I got there, my boyfriend was surrounded by girls who looked like Socs. I stopped the car and waited there, sighing.

"Hi." Steve reached me. "I can't call Soda, those girls wouldn't let him come…what d'you need?"

"Some gas…please."

I got off the car and sat on some bench nearby, as Steve pumped some gas. He always looked at me like I shouldn't date Soda and like I didn't deserve to be there. I was feeling sad and I didn't know why. Besides, I was cold. It was December and Christmas was just some days away.

I paid and watched Steve walk away. I had to move the car and leave, Soda didn't have any time for me. I felt like crying. I turned the engine on, but I didn't push the pedal like I should have, because the car gave a start and then stopped.

"Hey, Sybil…" Ponyboy was standing next to the car, peering inside. "You okay?"

"Hi, Pony…" I let my hair fall around my eyes because I didn't want him to see I was close to tears.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

I nodded.

"Soda…would want to reach you, but those girls…"

"I know." I looked at Ponyboy: he seemed a bit sad, too. So I had an idea. "You're fifteen, right, Pony?"

"Yeah…" he slowly nodded.

"Do you know how to drive?"

"Well…Two-Bit's tried to teach me once, but…it didn't work, because he was so drunk he fell asleep after a couple of minutes and I couldn't drive on my own. Why?"

"I'll teach you." I got off the car and let Pony take my place.

"I'm not sure if we should…"

"Don't worry, we can always stop."

I explained to Ponyboy what he should do and he started driving. He wasn't that bad. When I had started, I had been much worse than that. He suddenly stopped, though, when we reached some deserted place and got off the car. I followed him.

"Why did you get off-?"

"Look." Ponyboy jerked his head toward the setting sun. I watched. "It's beautiful…I never stop to watch sunsets anymore." I said.

"Yeah…I haven't done that in awhile, either…" Ponyboy looked dazed.

We stood there for some time, watching the day melt into twilight, till it got real cold and I drove Ponyboy home.

"Are you coming in?" he asked. "Soda should be home."

I didn't have the time to answer, because a very mad-looking Sodapop stormed out of the house. "Pony, go inside! I need to talk to Sybil!"

Ponyboy glanced at me and went inside. I got off the car to face Soda. "Hi…what happened?"

"Were you going to tell me sooner or later?" he asked, almost yelling.

"Tell you what?"

"You know what!"

I still looked confused, so my boyfriend had no choice but explain: "Tell me you have been meeting with that Seth guy for a month, the two of you alone!"

I felt sick. How did he find out? "How do you know?"

"Why? Do you like him and want to keep on going out with him?"

"I don't like him, Soda!" I replied. "I just…I needed help because I was failing in math and my teacher said I should work with Seth Tucker to improve, and I had no choice! All we did when we met at school was-"

"You should have asked someone else!" Soda shouted. "You should have asked your best friend, your father, whoever! You should've asked…"

"You?" I almost whispered.

"No, I'm dumb, I couldn't have helped you, but…but there's plenty of people who could have done that!"

"You're not dumb!"

"I am dumb! I am…or I'd've understood sooner that you didn't…that you don't care for me enough…to tell me about Seth." Sodapop looked hurt. Really hurt. "If you cared…why didn't you tell me?" he whispered.

I tried to find something to say. "Because…you'd get mad I was studying with him…"

"I wouldn't, if you told me from the beginning. Goodbye." He turned and started walking.

"Soda, wait! I didn't mean to hurt you! I just thought…"

"…I wasn't sensitive enough to understand you needed help for your math class. Right?"

"No!" I yelled. "And you can't blame me if I see Seth sometimes when all we do is studying! You're surrounded by girls everyday, girls who don't give a damn if you have a girlfriend or not! I should be worrying, not you!"

"What? Those girls would never go out with me! They only like to look at me, full stop! The Socs would never date a Greaser and the other ones, they only flirt, like they do with any other guy! And you should know better than that about 'em!"

"Well, it's you the one who doesn't trust me!"

"You don't trust me, either! Why don't you go find Seth?" Soda walked toward his house. I didn't stop him. I got into my car and slammed the door. I put the seatbelt on and tried to turn the engine on. I couldn't. I started crying for the second time that day.


	15. You're my Romeo

Hello readers! Whoever's read my story when I first posted it last year might not remember the final part of this chapter cause I changed it a bit and made it a little longer… enjoy!

**15 – You're my Romeo**

"You have to do something, you can't just stay at home all day long!"

"I don't feel like doing anything, Sophie…you and Julian go out and have fun."

"But…"

"Please, leave me alone!"

Sophie and I were talking about Christmas. She wanted to go out at night and celebrate it, but I didn't want to. Since Sodapop and I had had that fight, some days before, I wasn't in the best of moods.

My dad told me I shouldn't act like I was the queen of the world and apologize to Soda, but it wasn't my fault. Well, partly. Anyway, I wasn't acting like I was the queen of the world.

"Sybil? Are you okay?"

"Oh…sorry, Seth…I was just…thinking about some stuff. How are you spending Christmas?"

Seth looked startled, because I never asked him personal questions, but he answered: "I'm having lunch with my family…then I'll go out with my buddies. What are you going to do?"

"I don't know…yet. What did you say about this exercise?"

Seth looked at me oddly, then started explaining. I sighed. I wanted to spend a part of Christmas Day with Soda…but he didn't call me. And I didn't feel brave enough to call him…if he wouldn't talk to me, I'd seriously feel depressed. Even more than I already was. And Lewis didn't want to come for Christmas, either. I asked him, but he wouldn't stay in the same room as dad. So, consequently, on Christmas' Eve I was feeling sad. I was lying on my bed, staring at the present I bought for Soda right in front of me, and thinking about him.

"Sybil…" my dad knocked before entering the room. "Are you ready to go to church?"

"I forgot!"

My family used to go to church every Sunday, of course, but even for Christmas, at midnight, and it was eleven something.

"Don't you feel well?"

"No…I'll be ready in a couple of minutes…sorry, dad!"

He smiled and left. I tried to hurry up and was ready in less than ten minutes. "Here I am!" I reached dad who was waiting downstairs for me. Ten minutes later, we were entering the church. It was always different to go there at midnight, for Christmas, every year…especially when I started thinking about the past year, about the changes in my life. And the last months had definitely brought some very good and some very bad changes.

I wished Soda were there. He had told me once he didn't have much faith, but if only he could believe… he'd feel so much better. I knew. It was the same for me. There had been a couple of very difficult years for me and my faith had helped me a lot. It had made me feel hopeful, and stronger.

As dad and I left the church, after the usual greets with everyone we knew there, I felt sad. It was Christmas and Sodapop and I were still mad at each other…it was so wrong: Christmas was supposed to be a time when you forgive and forget, and we weren't definitely doing that.

But I was going to, if only he did the same. I needed Soda. That night, more than anything, I needed him.

Dad didn't go to bed immediately, when we got home. He sat in the living room and decided to watch some TV news. I told him news would only make him sad, because our world wasn't all rainbows and butterflies, but he said it made him feel thankful and very lucky, watching what was going on and knowing he and the people he loved were safe and well.

I was pretty tired, so I kissed him goodnight and went upstairs. After a couple of minutes I had been sitting there, on my bed, doing nothing but thinking about Soda, I heard knocking. I turned to the door. "Come in." But the noise didn't come from the door. I looked around and, in disbelief, I saw Soda standing outside. "Soda!" I screamed. "Are you crazy?"

I rushed to open the window: "Soda! What are you doing?" I helped him inside. "What…why…"

He grinned. "Hello, Sybil. I thought it'd be easier to reach your balcony, since it's only the first floor."

"What if you fell?"

"I'd only break some bones. You're worth that."

I stared into his eyes. "I didn't want to fight with you…"

"Me either. I'm sorry…I couldn't sleep well these past nights, because I felt guilty for the way I treated you."

"I feel guilty…I've felt guilty too…how did you reach my balcony without my father noticing?"

"I think he dozed off in front of the TV. I saw him from the window."

I laughed. "You're incredible."

"I take that as a compliment."

"It is." I couldn't help myself and I hugged him. "I missed you so much…"

"Me too." He whispered.

"Fighting like that was horrible…I don't want that to happen anymore…"

Soda came closer and started running his fingers through my hair. "I promise. I regret everything I said, I didn't mean that I don't trust you, it's just…"

"I know. You're jealous."

"What? I'm not jealous!"

I raised my eyebrows. He admitted it: "Alright, I am…a little…"

I laughed and kissed his head. Soda looked around. "So this is your room. It's nice."

"You think so?"

My room was quite large: in front of the bed where we were sitting there was one big closet and on its right there was the balcony from which Soda had climbed in. Next to the window there was one desk where I used to sit when I did my homework and on the other side of the bed, next to the door, there was my bookcase. I also had two bednight tables and one shelf full of cuddle toys.

"Yeah." Soda nodded. "I wouldn't lie to you. Hey, this is cute." He took one cuddle toy that resembled to a white horse and showed it to me.

"That one? My mom…bought it to me for my third birthday. It's real old…"

I thought about my mother. I missed her, especially on Christmas, and I used to pray a lot for her, even if I knew she was fine wherever she was.

I probably looked upset, because Sodapop wrapped his arms around me and grinned: "Hey, listen. I'll give my present to you tomorrow…if you feel like coming and visiting us…if your father doesn't mind, since it's Christmas."

"Of course he won't mind!"

Soda smiled and kissed me. I realized how cold he was. Well, of course, it was freezing outside. "You're so cold, Soda…"

"Aw, I'm fine."

"You're not." I wrapped a quilt around him and took his hands in mine. "How do you feel now?"

"Couldn't feel better."

"You're my Romeo." I grinned.

"What?" he looked confused.

"You climbed on the balcony to see me, just like Romeo did when he wanted to meet Juliet. And I've always thought that was incredibly romantic, since I first read their story when I was fifteen, and before knowing you I was sure such wonderful men couldn't exist, but I've been proven wrong." I smiled. "And I…don't think Juliet could be any happier than I am right now…I know it may not make sense to you, but I feel like I could be her."

"I get it now. But…I thought the two of them died in the end?"

"Yes, but that's just…well, I didn't mean we're gonna end up like that…"

Soda grinned. "I know. So what do they do when Romeo's reached Juliet on her balcony?"

"Well, actually, the first time he has to leave after she's told him she loves him back. Then, when he visits her at night the following time, he stays…" I trailed off. Soda was looking at me expectantly. "He stays and…you know…" I repeated.

"He stays and then?" Soda insisted.

"Then he…they…come on, Soda, you know what I mean!"

Soda started laughing. "Of course I do, but I wanted to tease you a bit!" I was blushing furiously. "Besides, you're so cute when you blush." He grinned.

"Stop making fun of me!"

"I didn't mean to." He smiled and kissed me. "Merry Christmas."


	16. Pony's crush

Hi guys! First part of this chapter is in Sybil's point of view, as usual, but the second part, the one in cursive writing, is in Soda's point of view.

**16 – Pony's crush**

January soon went by, without any exceptional happenings. February, though, started out much worse: I went to visit Lewis several times, but all of a sudden he was gone. He wasn't working with Seth anymore and everytime I tried to go see him at the apartment he had rented, no one would answer. I was afraid he'd gotten into trouble and I asked Owen if he knew anything about it, but he said he didn't. It didn't look like that though and I wondered if maybe Lewis had asked him not to tell anything about why and where he had gone.

Soda was incredibly sweet with me all the time: we got along better than ever and when I told him I was worried sick for my brother, he offered to go looking for him with me.

"I have no idea where he could be…but thanks anyway, Soda…"

Soda grinned and kissed me. I kissed him back. Steve entered the living room and rolled his eyes, or so it looked like to me: "Hi…"

"Hi, Steve!" I said, while Soda jumped and pretended to be glaring at him: "I still haven't forgiven you for last cards game." Steve had beaten him badly, I guessed. Even if the two of them didn't play honestly (Soda kept the aces in his shoes or whenever he could hide them well), Steve was always the one who ended up winning. Well, most of the time. I had watched them play twice and they were hilarious.

"Last time? I beat you the previous time, too, and the previous to that previous one…"

"Liar."

Soda and Steve started playing. I didn't have time to get bored, because Two-Bit joined the three of us and started chatting with me about one funny dream he had had the previous night about two blondes. He was going to say something dirty but Soda told him to shut his trap, firstly because I was blonde, too, and also because he didn't want me to listen to his rubbish. Two-Bit pretended to be offended and finished his beer.

When Ponyboy came home, too, he looked upset. No one seemed to notice but me.

"Are you okay, Pony?" I asked him.

"What? Oh, yeah…I'm fine…"

I could tell he was lying. "I thought you needed help with your history essay…do you want me to lend a hand?" I hinted.

"Sure…"

I followed Pony in his and Soda's bedroom and he collapsed on his bed. "Thanks for asking. I'm fine, though…just a bit tired."

"You look more than tired. Did something happen at school?" I sat next to him and pushed my long hair out of the way.

"No…well…kind of…"

"Maybe you prefer to tell Soda about it?" I realized he may not be that comfortable talking with me about a personal issue.

"It's not because of you…I don't feel like talking about it now…but thank you, Sybil. When I feel like venting, I'll ask you."

"Alright!" I smiled.

"Are you reading something lately?" Ponyboy and I loved books and we often talked together about writers and plots and stories.

"Not really…I haven't read anything in a while. I have some books to read, though…_Tale of two cities_ by Dickens…"

"I read that one!" Ponyboy finally seemed to be at his ease. "You have to read it, it's great!"

"I'll read it then!"

"I'm…" he started to whisper. "I'm sorry about your brother. Soda told me…I mean, he didn't say much, just you were sad because he's…away."

"Thanks…I just hope he's not in trouble."

"What are you two talking about?" Soda rushed in the room and sat beside me.

"I thought you were playing cards…" I reminded him.

"Yeah, but Steve's a pain, he's full of tricks and he doesn't play fairly. Honestly, it gets stressful!"

Pony laughed and I kind of elbowed him lightly: "You never play fairly!"

"Of course, he doesn't let me. Are you having dinner with us?"

"I'd like that, but I have to cook for my father, he's coming home late and he'll be tired."

"Aw…I don't want you to go already!" Soda faked his best little child's voice.

Since I didn't want to leave Soda and he didn't want to leave me, we decided he'd have dinner at my house, so he could stay with me till my father came home. He told Pony and Darry (who had just gotten back from work) and we left.

"Soda, listen…Pony seemed a bit upset and I asked what was wrong, but he didn't want to talk…maybe when you get home you could make him open up…" I said as we were making dinner. Well, I was making dinner. Soda was helping.

"Really? I was too busy playing with Steve to notice…when Pony's like that it's usually nothing good…"

"I bet. He looked sad…more like melancholic than sad, actually."

"I'll talk to him as soon as I go home." I noticed Sodapop looked worried. I felt bad. "I didn't want to make you worry…"

"I'm okay!" He grinned and kissed me. "You're so sweet…"

"Really?"

"Yeah…"

"But Steve and Darry don't like me much, do they?"

"What? Why you think so?"

"It's quite obvious…Steve doesn't even look at me and your brother, well, he…acts like I'm not right for you, or something…"

"Darry's like that, he doesn't open up much with people he doesn't know well…heck, he doesn't even open up in front of me and Ponyboy sometimes! And Steve…it's not that he doesn't like you, he just…"

I intervened: "Soda, I know he doesn't like me…he probably thinks you should go out with some greaser girl…right?"

"It don't matter what he thinks, it's only what I think that matters…and I think I'm in love with you."

He had never told me that. It felt good to hear it, I was actually suddenly feeling like a big weight had been lifted from my shoulders and I would have replied, if my father had not entered the kitchen. Talk about bad timing. "Hi…nice to see you, Sodapop."

"Good evening, Mr. Forrester…"

"Dad, it's almost ready! Soda's having dinner with us…since I knew you were coming home late, I asked him to stay."

"Of course, he can stay anytime... I'll have a shower…you can start eating, I'll join you soon."

Dad looked real tired. I hoped he hadn't had any troubles at work. First Pony looking miserable, now him. What was going on?

------------------------------------------------------------ 

_Life ain't wonderful. I learned that a long time ago, when my parents died. I was so carefree before of that… it was like I had no worries in the world 'cause I didn't want to have any worries. Cause I knew mom and dad, and my brothers, would always be there to help me, whatever happened. _

_But when my parents died in that car crash, my consciousness came back to me. Kinda like…when you wake up after a long sleep… after a long dream. And I knew I had to be more responsible to stay with Darry and Pony, because the State would only let us together as long as we behaved, since Darry was the only one of age. I ain't a hood or anything like that, so my attitude hasn't changed much since I was a kid: I've always been happy-go-lucky, I've always enjoyed having fun with my buddies, even though we're considered hoodlums by most people. _

------------------------------------------------------------ 

_Life ain't wonderful. I know that…but since I met Sybil, I've changed my perspective. Life ain't perfect, it ain't some sort of movie where villains get punished in the ending. But if it wasn't like that…it wouldn't be life. I never thought I'd forget Sandy, but I did. I thought I loved her more than anything, but I ain't so sure anymore now…_

"_Soda…"_

_I realized Sybil was looking at me. "Yeah?"_

"_Do you want another piece of cake?"_

"_No, thanks, I'm stuffed. I loved that cake, will you give me the recipe? Darry can cook it." I joked._

"_I can't picture Darry cooking a chocolate cake…" Sybil grinned. "I don't have the recipe, a neighbour gave it to us. Mrs. Morgan, she's such a nice lady, always baking cakes and sweet stuff for us." _

_Sybil was so beautiful. I wanted to kiss her so bad, but her father was sitting right in front of me so I'd have to wait._

_I glanced at the clock. It was time to go, I wanted to talk to Pony, Sybil had told me about his strange behavior. "You want any help with the dishes, before I go?"_

"_No, I'll wash them, don't worry…I know you want to talk to Ponyboy."_

"_You sure?"_

"_Of course!"_

_I said goodbye to Mr. Forrester and walked outside with Sybil. "Are you busy tomorrow?" I asked her._

"_I have to work at the shop after school…why don't you come by for a bit?"_

"_Sure will." I promised. "And don't worry too much about your brother, Sybil. I know it's hard, but try to…okay?"_

_She nodded. "Okay." _

_I smiled and kissed her. It was so reassuring…it made me feel the most powerful person in the whole world, and at the same time, the weakest, because I needed her kisses. I needed to be with her. I was becoming addicted to Sybil and she probably had no idea. I didn't know if I should tell her yet._

_When I arrived home, Ponyboy was busy doing his homework. Darry looked like he was going to fall asleep on the sofa, even if he was desperately trying to listen to the news read by some journalist on TV. Once again, I thought he didn't deserve what life had done to him. He didn't deserve all that harshness, if that's even a word. I'm not good with words. Never have been. Another reason why I quit school. I never understood its importance, or lack of. Darry, on the other hand, deserved college, and if it wasn't for the death of our parents he would be going to college these days, I'm sure. He's awful brainy, just like Ponyboy. But Darry thinks much more than Pony: my little brother studies way less than Darry did and gets high grades, while Darry used to study a lot and was a straight A's student. He had, and still has, potential, though. I hope someday he'll be able to do what he really wants. Thinking about it, it's only three years till Ponyboy turns 18 and he won't need Darry as his guardian anymore. I'm already a legal adult and I could look after Pony, too, if the State would let me, but I'm sure Darry'll have to wait three more years before he can stop being a guardian. It seems like he doesn't mind it much, nowadays, though. I guess it's because he loves us._

"_Hey, Pony." I entered our bedroom and sat on the bed. "Have you finished your homework?"_

"_Not really." He mumbled, staring at the piece of paper in front of him. That rubbish, I was so glad I was over it. "But I'll finish tomorrow, I'm tired." He yawned and sat next to me._

_I waited. I knew he was going to ask me something. At first I couldn't understand anything, because he started rambling about every possible subject, but in the end I understood Ponyboy had a crush on some girl. He wouldn't admit it though, he just said he had thought a lot about this girl lately…_

"_So…why don't you ask her out?" I suggested._

"_I can't, Soda! I…she's going out with someone already."_

"_Who?"_

"_Bryon Douglas. You don't know him anyway…"_

"_Bryon Douglas…" I repeated. The name didn't ring any bell. "Is he a Greaser?"_

"_Kinda…he ain't rich, but he doesn't live really close to this part of the town, either…"_

"_Well, they may break up and you can ask her out then. If they don't, that means the girl doesn't deserve a great kid like you, Pony."_

_Ponyboy shook his head. "Maybe it's the other way around. Maybe I don't deserve someone like her…"_

_I sighed. "I know how you feel, Pony…first love sucks at times…but don't give up, it ain't like she's married to that other guy. And even if you think you love someone…it's so difficult to be sure. It's difficult to tell."_

_Pony whispered: "You love Sybil…or you still love Sandy?"_

"_What do you think?" I smiled. Before any of us could say anything, the phone rang, and Darry yelled: "Pony, it's Mark!"_

"_Alright, here I come!"_

"_Mark who?" I asked. _

"_Mark Jennings…you saw him once!" and he left to answer, without further explanation. I sighed. "Do I really love Sybil?"_


	17. Letters

Hello! As some of you may know/remember when I first posted my story on here, I was going to write a sequel…well, I actually am! I'm writing parts of it these days, when I have some free time, and since I'm still in the beginning (but I have a plot, don't worry), I wanted to let you know that all suggestions are welcome! If there's something you'd like to see happening, maybe I will be able to put it in the story, so just message me:-)

Now on with the story! Just like the previous chapter…first part is in Sybil's point of view, second part is in Soda's POV!

**17 – Letters**

"What do you mean you're dying?"

"You heard me, Sybil. I'm sick. I'm dying."

I couldn't hold back tears. "You can't be dying!"

"I am. Tomorrow I'll be dead."

Lewis was staring at me like I were some stranger he had never met before, while telling me the news. "I'll be dead and it's not like you give a damn. No one gives a damn. That's why I'm dying."

"What?" I cried. He was speaking nonsense. "You must be out of your mind to say such things!"

"I can see what you cannot see. Bye."

He walked away and darkness fell over me. I started crying because I couldn't reach him anymore. And then…

"Sybil, wake up! You're going to be late!"

My eyes fluttered open and I looked around: dad was in my bedroom and apparently he had been calling me for a while. "Dad…"

"I called you several times but you wouldn't wake up…are you all right?"

"Yes…just…a nightmare…" I shivered. It had been dreadful. What a stupid dream! Just because I hadn't seen my brother in a while it didn't mean he was dead, or going to be. What I had dreamt didn't make sense, but then again, most dreams never made any sense. But this one had seemed so real…

I ate breakfast in a hurry because I was late for school. Since I had met Soda, school wasn't that important to me anymore. And I was afraid of that. I was afraid I was losing my mind because I had to get very good grades in school if I wanted to go to a good college and become a great lawyer like my dad. I had told Soda that I wanted to be a lawyer and he had said jokingly that when I would be one I could take him out of jail anytime. I didn't like it very much when he joked about jail or serious stuff like that, but maybe that was the only thing he could think of to tell me at the time.

I thought I could stay home that day. I could afford missing one day of school, it wouldn't hurt. But I knew I couldn't skip lessons, dad would kill me if he ever found out. It was Friday though, I could rest the following weekend and see Soda. He had Friday afternoon off, so, after a long and tiring school day, when I had to avoid Seth all the time because he wouldn't leave me alone for one second and also try to get that nightmare off my mind, I reached the Curtis' house and hoped Soda would be there and not off somewhere with Steve. I couldn't really like Steve because he always looked annoyed whenever he saw me.

I had just stepped inside Soda's house when I heard voices coming from upstairs. I didn't want to eavesdrop but they were almost yelling. I didn't know what to do, so I stood there and listened.

"You don't know anything about her!"

"This is not the point!"

"Yes, it is! You can't judge people-"

"I don't want you to end up like last time with Sandy!"

"I won't! This time's different! I…Darry, I love her!"

My heart skipped a few beats.

"You said you loved Sandy, too!"

"I was younger and Sandy was my first love! It was different!"

"Every time is different! You always think you know exactly what you're talking about, but it's not always rainbows and butterflies!"

"So I can never be happy?"

"I don't mean that!"

"You don't know what you're talking about, Darry! You've never been in love!"

Silence. I could tell Soda was sorry he had just uttered those words. It seemed like ages before Darry spoke again.

"I know how to care for someone, Soda, and I care about you. I don't want you to get hurt. That's why I think Sybil's not right for you."

So that was why Darry didn't like me. He was afraid I'd break Soda's heart and he didn't want to see his little brother suffer anymore.

"Whatever." Soda muttered something and I quickly went outside. I pretended I hadn't heard anything when he saw me near my car.

"Sybil! Hey!" he reached me. "School's over?"

"Yes, so I thought I would meet you…"

"You thought great!" he grinned. "Wanna go get a coke somewhere?"

"Sure!" I smiled back and followed him into his car. He looked happy, but I couldn't be happy at the moment. His brother didn't like me and probably Steve, his best buddy, agreed with Darry. I couldn't think about it without feeling horrible. I wasn't going to hurt Soda, but of course they couldn't know. Maybe I needed to talk to them. I was so confused.

When I got home, I found a letter from Lewis. That made me feel better, till I read the last lines. **I got my draft letter and I left Tulsa some weeks ago. Sorry if I didn't say anything, but I've never been good at saying goodbye. Hopefully I'll see you again, soon. Lewis.**

---------------------------------------------------------- 

"_You know we never fight. It was kind of…"_

"_Awkward."_

"_Yes, a lot. I don't know how it happened, one moment we were chatting about rubbish and the other one we were screaming at the top of our lungs." _

"_At least he doesn't give you five bucks to make up for it." Steve scowled. He hated the way his old man yelled at him and then gave him dough so that Steve would forget about all the screaming and the insults. _

"_I guess so." I sighed. "But Sybil's really important to me, Darry should understand that! Just because Sandy…betrayed me…that don't mean Sybil will…she's so different from Sandy…" _

"_And yet quite similar, right?" Steve interrupted me. _

_I thought for a while. "In some ways…how d'you know?"_

"_I know you, buddy." He laughed. "You're like an open book to me."_

"_Right." I pretended to punch him, but I stopped because some customer needed him. I watched him work and once he was over with it I waited for him to reach me. "Got a cigarette?" he asked._

"_No…you know I don't smoke much."_

"_Yeah, you're a goody-two-shoes, man." He smirked._

"_Don't you ever repeat that!" I threw a dirty towel at him and in response he blew some smoke in my face, making me cough a little._

"_Seriously, Soda…why don't you go and visit Sandy?"_

"_What?" I thought I had gone deaf. "Excuse me?"_

"_You should see her again to understand if you still love her."_

"_I don't."_

"_You can't be that sure until you see her again. She was definitely less boring than Sybil is."_

"_Sybil ain't boring! She's a good girl, she wouldn't sleep with someone else while she's dating me!" _

"_By the way…" Steve was finishing his cigarette and looked totally relaxed. "Have you two…"_

"_No we haven't." I turned my back to him and started tidying up the counter a bit. _

_Steve gazed at me like I was an alien. "What?"_

"_We've only been going out for six months, you know."_

"_So what? You did sleep with Sandy after, like, two months you first started dating!"_

"_And look what happened then!" I almost yelled. "Besides…I was really horny when I was sixteen…"_

"_You still are."_

"_Yeah, but I ain't obsessed with…you know. I don't think about it all day and night long."_

"_Shoot! I don't recognize you anymore, Soda! You should really sleep with Sybil, then, if the whole thing is lousy, you dump her. If not, you stay with her. It's that simple."_

"_Don't talk about her like that! I don't want to fight with you, too…Darry was enough. I bet he's still mad at me because I told him he doesn't love and he doesn't know how to. And that was two weeks ago." I wanted to get off the whole sleep-with-Sybil subject. It was making me uncomfortable because I was realizing I really would have liked to sleep with her. I needed to get my mind out of the gutter._

"_Whatever, man, just apologize to him."_

"_Why should I? Ponyboy's quite right about Darry! He's hard and cold and…and I hate him when he's like that." I was over reacting, but I didn't care. I was getting mad thinking about my brother and my best friend judging me and my relationship with Sybil all the time. _

_Steve didn't say anything. I continued to vent for a while, until I saw Ponyboy in the corner of my eye. He was walking toward Steve and me. "Hey, Pony." I greeted him._

"_Hey…" he looked miserable. _

"_What's the matter?" I rushed to him. "Something bad happened?"_

"_Not really. Just…I didn't do too good on track training today…"_

"_And?"_

"_I saw Cathy with her boyfriend."_

_Cathy was his crush. "They'll break up eventually and you'll be there to comfort her. You're much better than that other guy, Pony."_

"_You don't even know him…"_

"_So? My little brother is better than anyone else!" I grinned and was relieved when I saw he was grinning, too. "If you wait for me, we'll go home together. Another half an hour and I'm off."_

"_Sure."_

_Ten minutes later, I was staring at Pony. He was daydreaming. I guessed he was probably thinking of his crush. I wished I was like Pony sometimes. He was the best out of us three brothers, he really was, but he was also the less self-confident, and that was a trouble sometimes._

_As we were walking home, I felt the need to ask him something: "Pony?"_

"_Yeah?"_

"_What do you think of Sybil?"_

_He looked at me like he thought that was a weird question:"Well…I like her…she's nice and she's…different from the other girls. I mean, she ain't a Soc but she ain't a greaser either and that makes her special…she seems very sensitive…and we like the same books, I think it's a good thing."_

_I couldn't understand how that kid's mind worked at times. "I'm gonna go see Sandy." I announced._

"_What?"_

"_I need to see her. I'll go when I have a day off, next week."_

"_Why?"_

"_I don't know, guess I'm just nuts. I feel like I have to, like…to move on, you understand what I mean?"_

_He shook his head. "Can't say I do."_

_I laughed. "That's okay, you will someday. Now I only need to tell Darry about it. I hope he doesn't get mad."_

"_He won't, he never gets mad at you."_

_Pony didn't know about the fight we had had. I couldn't wait to reach our house and break the news to Darry. I wanted to get it off my chest. When we got there, we found our brother sitting at the kitchen table, with his hands in his hair. He looked lost, like he didn't know what was his place, like he was in big trouble and didn't know what to do, or what to think._

"_Darry, are you okay?" Ponyboy spoke first._

_Darry didn't look at us at first, then, after what seemed like ages, he got up and muttered some words none of us could hear. He looked like he was on the verge of tears but he never cried and I couldn't imagine what could have happened to make him act like that._

_I finally noticed he had some piece of paper in front of him. I grabbed it and felt my heart sink. It was a draft letter. Addressed to **Curtis, Darrel and Sodapop**._


	18. Home is behind

Hi y'all! (I know "y'all" is kind of a Southern thing, and since I don't live in the US I don't know why I wrote that…I guess it's just because I like the way it sounds…yeah, I'm nuts!)

Anyway…guess what, I forgot the disclaimer several times in the past chapters! I don't even know why we're supposed to put it on every page, since it's OBVIOUS we poor fanfiction writers don't own anything, but I'll say it once again: I don't own the Outsiders, I only wish I did! I only wish I could write such an awesome book just like SE Hinton did!

You'll probably find this chapter kind of sad…but don't feel too depressed once you're finished reading it, alright? And, once again, the part in _cursive_ is in Soda's point of view (and the reference "just a figure in a big Monopoly game" comes from one song called "Strong Enough to Break" by Hanson)!

**18 – Home is behind…**

"But you can do something! Anything, I don't care! Just do-"

"I can't, Sybil. I can't do anything."

"But you're a lawyer!"

"That doesn't mean I can change laws!"

"If you don't do anything, Soda will leave and I probably won't see him until this stupid war is over! Or maybe I will never see him after he leaves because anything could happen to him! Dad…please!"

"Sybil, I _would_ help if I knew what to do, but I don't. Everyone would be asking not to go to war if it were possible, but it isn't."

"Thanks so much!" I yelled and left, slamming the front door. I got into the car and turned the engine on, angrily. I couldn't believe my father was acting that unreasonable! He sounded like he didn't even care, like he didn't even know Sodapop! I couldn't believe first Lewis, now Soda and Darry had gotten their draft letters! But what was worse, was the fact that Soda, Darry and Pony had gone to Oklahoma City to explain the peculiar situation they were in and that if the both of them left, Ponyboy, only 15, would be on his own. The result was, they said Darry could stay, since he had always been the legal guardian of his brothers since the beginning, but Soda had to go. They said he wouldn't get sent to Vietnam or anything for the moment, though, because first they needed to teach him how to "survive", so he would get sent to some training camp. That definitely sounded anything but heartening, especially for me. How could they send letters to eighteen year olds and force them to go to fight and possibly lose their young lives? I couldn't believe how crazy the situation was. I wished strongly, like I never had before, that we all were hippies so we could do what the hell we wanted and not obey every single stupid law and rule. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't.

I drove aimlessly for a while. Soda had to leave in a week. I didn't know how I could stand it once he was gone. _If only I could do something. Everything. I would…_

I decided I'd go and pick up Ponyboy. He was probably still at school because of his sport activities and I thought we understood each other better than anyone else, at the moment. I knew he loved Soda deeply and he would be heart-broken if he left.

When I reached his school, I quietly walked inside the building. I had never been there before, since I attended another school, and I didn't know where he would be practicing at. Then I saw someone familiar. I knew those sideburns. "Two-Bit!"

"Hi, Sybil!" he grinned. "What'cha doing here?"

"I thought I would come and pick up Ponyboy…do you happen to know where he is now?"

"If he ain't practicin', he's probably in the school library. I'll walk you to both places so we can find out where he is."

"Thanks." I smiled weakly and started walking next to him.

"I know it's hard…I wish it was me instead of him." He suddenly exclaimed, looking at me. "I mean, I wouldn't mind goin' there and beating 'em up."

"So you didn't get any…?"

"Not yet. Maybe I will soon. Maybe I could leave with Soda anyway."

"You're a great friend…"

"Don't say that, you make me blush." He grinned, not looking flushed at all. "Want a cigarette?" he took one out of his pocket.

"No, I don't smoke…"

"I forgot. Sorry. I read one of Pony's letters once, he said I was sorta scatter-brained. I really am, I guess. You know my teacher kicked me out of the classroom one time because I couldn't understand what she was saying? But it was her fault, she had the thickest Western accent I've ever heard. Everyone pretended to understand her, but me…"

I laughed and wondered if he had made that up to make me smile.

"Look, Pony's over there."

We stopped and saw Pony busy chatting with his teacher. He then nodded and turned, like he was ready to go, and then noticed us. "Hey! Why are you here?"

"Pony…" Two-Bit became serious all of a sudden. "It's hard to tell you, it's hard to tell anybody…actually…Sybil and I love each other and we're gonna run away together!"

I looked at him like he was nuts. Then I saw Ponyboy was smiling and I knew Two-Bit wanted to make both of us laugh. "Why, don't you believe me?"

"Sure I believe you…why you still at school?" Pony asked again.

"I had nothing better to do. I think I'll go get some booze now, though…we need plenty if we're gonna run away, right, Sybil?"

"…Right…lots of booze!" I nodded, pretending I was fine with the idea.

"So I'll see you later, Juliet…" Two-Bit grinned.

"What? Why Juliet?"

"Cause Romeo and Juliet ran away together, didn't they?"

Pony and I shook our heads. "Huh…not exactly." He said.

"Nevermind…later!"

Ponyboy and I left the building, too. "So…how are you doing, Pony?" I glanced at him. I had just asked him the stupidest question ever. "Sorry…I didn't mean it like that…" I apologized.

"No, it's alright…I guess you're not feeling any better than I am…"

I shook my head. "It hurts so much I think I will break sometimes…"

"I know, me too."

I noticed he was getting taller. He would definitely look a lot like Soda when he was a bit older. That thought somehow made me feel better, even though I wasn't sure why.

The following week went by too quickly: Soda and I saw each other every day and even if we didn't speak much about the war topic, we both knew those could be our last days together. I cried myself to sleep every night and in the morning I always felt like hell. Then I saw Soda and I felt better. Then I remembered that he would leave soon and I felt like hell again. It was a vicious circle. And I hated myself, because I wanted to be stronger, to seem strong, at least, to everyone else.

Our last day together, we stayed in my living room for all the afternoon (dad was obviously at work), on the sofa, holding hands and talking. Soda would leave the following morning and I was so nervous. I guess he was more than me, but he wasn't showing it.

"Sybil…will you wait for me?"

"Of course! You shouldn't even ask…I will wait till you come back and then you'll never leave me anymore…right?"

"Sure I won't." He sighed. "I need a cigarette, really bad…" he took one out of his pocket. "I'll go outside…be back in a minute."

I nodded and watched him get up and leave the room. My hands were trembling. I was really tense. I needed to calm down.

I reached Soda outside. "Hey…" I whispered.

"Sybil, it's cold, you should have a jacket on…"

I got closer to him and took his cigarette. "Can I…?" I didn't finish the question. Soda looked at me, startled, as I inhaled some smoke. Then I started to cough like crazy. I couldn't almost breathe. Soda took the cigarette and held me as I calmed down. "Why?"

"I thought…smoke is supposed to steady your nerves…well, I…I once heard some classmates of mine say that…" I explained, since he was looking at me sceptically.

Soda sighed and placed a kiss on my head. "Don't smoke ever again, do it for me, will you?"

I nodded, fighting against the tears. I didn't want to cry in front of him. I hugged him, wishing time would stop going by.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

_So that was it. I was going to leave. That very day._

_I glanced at the clock. It was three in the morning and I couldn't sleep. Ponyboy was lying next to me, probably lost in some weird dream. I wished I could close my eyes and not think about anything for another whole day. I wished I had another day to spend with Sybil. She probably didn't understand how much she meant to me. No one did, not even Darry. He thought I was crazy, he thought I still was a kid who couldn't really love…except for my brothers, but that's different._

_I wasn't a kid. I was almost a man. _

"_Soda?" Pony whispered._

_I looked up. "Yeah?"_

"_Can't you sleep?"_

"_Nope. You fully awake?"_

"_Yeah…I dreamt about something, one of those dreams I can't remember…and it woke me."_

"_I'm sorry about that."_

"_Soda, don't go."_

"_I wish I could stay, Pony. But I have to go."_

"_You could leave Tulsa and no one would ever find out where you'd go! I wouldn't tell, no one would…and…we could come and visit you all the time! Sybil could stay with you this whole summer, and the war would finally end and then-"_

"_Whoa, calm down, Ponyboy!" I almost laughed. "As usual, you're a highly imaginative kid, like your teacher says. That wouldn't work… me running away. And I ain't no coward who won't fight for his country."_

"_But this war's useless! It doesn't make any sense that you have to go and fight and maybe get hurt or maybe…" he stopped talking._

"_Come on, Pony. We'd better try to sleep some." I didn't want to talk with him anymore. My heart was slowly breaking and I couldn't help but try to ignore it, ignore the situation, so that maybe it would stop. For a while. _

_Ponyboy was silent. And then, before I realized it, both of us had fallen asleep._

_-----------------------------------------------------------------------_

_I didn't sleep much, though. At six and a half, I was up, in the kitchen, making some coffee. I usually didn't drink any, but I really needed it that morning. I didn't even feel like eating some chocolate cake. Man, was I feeling off the wall._

_I saw Darry in the corner of my eye. He was standing in the doorway, wearing only his jeans despite the cold March morning weather, and I could tell he didn't know how to act. I knew he felt guilty because he got to stay and I got to leave._

"_I'll come back, Darry." I said, startling him and also myself. _

"_I know you will…" he replied, sounding convinced, although his face showed no sign of confidence._

"_Look after Pony and don't get mad at him, okay? He always tries his best." I reminded him._

"_I wish it was me, you know…" Darry looked so guilty, even though he didn't have to. I knew we couldn't avoid all this._

_We looked at each other, very awkwardly, before he hugged me. "Take care of yourself, little buddy."_

_I nodded, feeling tears well up at the corners of my eyes. I didn't know how I could cope without my brothers. Then I noticed Pony was standing there, looking at us, silently crying. We all were emotional wrecks that morning, I'm sure._

_Saying goodbye to Steve was horrible and saying goodbye to Sybil was even worse. I felt like my heart was being shattered in a thousand pieces. Sybil wasn't crying and I wasn't, either, but we both were doing our best to restrain ourselves, I could tell. _

"_I better go, Sybil…"_

"_Already?" she was staring at me like I represented her whole world, like everything was going to collapse after I was gone, and I never realized how striking her blue eyes were, till that very moment._

"_Yeah…you know I'll write, even if I suck at writing…but I'll try for you…" I whispered._

_She nodded and buried her face on my shoulder. I could tell she had started crying. I let her for a while, then I said: "Hey, I wanna see you smile…Ponyboy'll tell me how you'll behave while I'm away!" I grinned. She had to grin, too. "Okay…"_

"_I'll come back soon. I promise." _

_Sybil looked at me like she didn't believe me and she was kind of right: I couldn't promise anything, since I couldn't choose when to leave, where to go, what to do: I was only another figure in a big Monopoly game, or so I felt._

_I left broken-hearted. I didn't know what life would be like for me in the following months, I didn't know what would happen. I only knew Two-Bit would reach me soon because he had gotten his draft letter, too, and I wasn't sure if that was a blessing or a curse._


	19. the world ahead

If you're a fan of The Lord of the Rings, you may have noticed that the title of the 18th chapter along with the title of this one put together _(Home is behind, the world ahead)_ belongs to the song Pippin sings in _Return of the King._ I love that song!

**19 - …the world ahead**

It was Spring when Soda left, but it felt more like Autumn to me, because I could almost feel life drained from me. Soda had promised he would write and he kept his promise: not even a couple of weeks after he had left, I received one letter and happily found out he was under training in some camp in California and he also said it looked like they wouldn't move from there for quite a while. That reassured me, since I was afraid they'd send him to fight abroad as soon as he reached the camp.

I immediately replied to Soda: from that moment, for several months, we exchanged letters where we talked about everything and told us even our inner thoughts, because it was very simple to do that when you weren't looking into each other's eyes, and especially for me, being quite shy, I found out I could tell Soda about almost every single topic that came to my mind, without feeling embarrassed like I would if he was physically close to me.

March and April soon went by. I missed Soda so much I dreamt of him every night and they weren't always pleasant dreams: I often had nightmares which concerned him being hurt, being sent away and even being killed, so that when I woke up in the morning I always felt relieved and thanked God it was just a nightmare. Ponyboy, on the other hand, wasn't having that many nightmares, or so he said, but his grades at school started slipping and even Darry couldn't holler at him the way he used to do, because the both of them grew more and more anxious as days went by.

"Daydreaming again?"

I looked up. "Hi, Seth…"

Since Soda had left, Seth had been acting more kindly toward me, always paying attention to what he was saying, being careful not to insult the greasers or anyone else, for that matter, because he knew I hated it.

"How are you doing?" he sat next to me. The last class of the day would start soon, almost everyone was sitting in their desk, but he didn't seem to care.

"Great. I'm perfectly fine."

"Honestly, Sybil." He raised his eyebrows like he didn't believe me.

"It's a nightmare." I replied earnestly. "I…" I got up. "Excuse me." I quickly left the classroom. I was close to tears and didn't want to start crying in front of everybody. I sat outside, in the school garden, and since no one was around, I started weeping. Then I turned, startled, when one hand rested my shoulder.

"I'm sorry." Seth sounded, and looked, like he really meant it. "I would help you if I could do anything."

I nodded. He really looked concerned for once. "I miss him so much…I wish…I wish I could drop school and move to California, just to stay close to him! I hate every guy who gets to stay here in Tulsa, because it isn't fair! It isn't fair that some have to leave because of a stupid letter and others get to stay because they're lucky!"

"Life isn't fair…" Seth sat next to me and put his arms around my shoulders. "You should cry…to vent."

He didn't need to tell me, because I was already in tears. I cried till I had a major headache and I noticed Seth's shirt was pretty soaked. "Sorry…didn't mean to…" I whispered, slowly retreating from his arms.

"No problem…"

My outburst had helped me feel better. I stared at Seth and he stared back at me, and before we had time to speak, the bell rang, signaling the end of lessons for that day. "Well, I guess…I'll see you tomorrow…" I said. "Thanks…"

Seth smiled before walking away. I felt confused. I shouldn't have acted like that in front of him, but I hadn't done that on purpose, I needed to give vent to my feelings and I probably would have done the same if everyone else had been there…

_No. You wouldn't have and you know it. _A voice inside my head replied. _You don't have to get too close to him._

I sighed. I didn't know how I was going to stand Soda's absence anymore. I needed him.

As I headed home, I realized it was Friday. And an idea popped into my mind.

---------------------------------------------------------------

"How do you feel, Pony?"

"Nervous. What about you?"

"I feel the same…maybe this wasn't a good idea, after all…" I bit my lower lip.

"It was a great idea! I thought I was going crazy, but it's because of you if I haven't gone insane yet! Even if we're probably going to get skinned when we go back home…"

"I know." I sighed. "Well…maybe they'll understand."

Ponyboy looked at me like I was nuts. I didn't say anything. We were almost in California. We had gotten up at five in the morning and had taken the train to reach California, to reach Soda. It was Saturday morning so we weren't missing any school; yet, my dad would probably get really mad, just like Darry, even if we had left them notes explaining we were getting back that same day or, if we couldn't make it, on Sunday. We were going to get punished badly, but we didn't really care, since we didn't have anything to lose.

"Sybil…what if they won't let us meet Soda?"

"Well…in his letters, Soda said they were usually more free in the weekends…I hope he wasn't kidding…"

"Me too. I wonder if he's really okay like he said."

"We'll find out soon, won't we?" I replied calmly, despite not being that calm at all. I was very anxious and worried.

We finally got to California and called a taxi, which took us straight to the place where Soda and dozens of other guys were staying in. Luckily, we knew the address from the letters Soda sent to us. But when we reached the place, the gates were closed and no one could be seen around, despite the huge park.

"Hum, Sybil…what should we do?"

"…I have no idea. It looks like we can't get in anyway…maybe we should try to phone…" Soda had phoned me sometimes since he went away, but he said he couldn't do it often: the only reason he was able to call was because he had sweet-talked one secretary lady into it. Being as charming as he was, it hadn't been difficult, he said.

Neither of us moved, though. We were kind of excited and scared at the same time and we probably couldn't believe we had gotten there, so close to Soda.

"Hey, who are you?"

A tall, red-haired guy approached us. He was dressed like he was part of the Army and he looked very young, probably younger than he really was. He was carrying a huge bag.

"Are you looking for someone?" he insisted.

"Actually…" Ponyboy cleared his throat. "We're looking for my brother who was sent here last March because of a draft letter. Are you-"

"I'm one of those who got the draft letter, too. What's your brother's name?"

"Soda…Curtis."

"Sodapop? You two do lookalike, now that I pay attention. What's your name?"

I could see Pony was a bit reluctant, but he answered: "Ponyboy…what's yours?"

The guy smiled and told us his name was Charlie. I was feeling kind of left out, because he addressed mainly to Ponyboy and so I piped up: "Do you think it would be possible…to see Soda?"

"Are you his girlfriend?"

I nodded, blushing a little. He went on: "He talks about you a lot. Well, I left the building to buy some stuff for me and the guys… you know, cigarettes and things like that…I can tell Soda you're here, he'll probably manage to get a permission to spend this afternoon out of there. Just wait, okay?"

We thanked Charlie so much, he started to laugh, but reassured us it was nothing, before leaving.

Ponyboy and I sat on a bench nearby. "Man, I'm sweating so much." He said.

"We don't need to worry anymore, Pony." I smiled. "We're going to see Soda!"

"Yeah." He smiled hugely. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Well, I was wondering if…" he trailed off.

"Come on, say it."

"If I…really look a tiny bit like Soda." He blushed. "I mean, I'm not that conceited to think I do, but-"

I stopped him. "You do. And not just a tiny bit. You should be proud, Pony!"

"Aw, you should try to look more like me, instead." A familiar voice came from behind us. We turned: "Two-Bit!"

"Hey, I know you missed me, but be quiet!" he was talking to Pony, who was hugging him. "The place here ain't so bad, you know? How are you two doin'?"

"We're great, now that we're here! How are you?"

"Fine, but they won't let me drink beer quite enough." He made a sad face.

"Come on, drop it, Two-Bit!" I heard the most wonderful voice in the world and yelled: "Soda!"

Then, before I knew it, Soda, Pony and I were all hugging ourselves. "How are you doing? They cut your tuff hair! It's such a shame! We couldn't wait to see you again! Everyone's missing you at home!" Ponyboy and I started talking at the same time.

"Calm down, the both of you! I'm perfectly fine!" he grinned crazily, just like he used to do when he was home in Tulsa. He was as handsome as usual, just a bit skinnier and with quite short hair. It was a pity that they had made him cut it, but it would grow back, I thought.

"I got a permission to stay out today…" Soda said. "We can go somewhere and chat, alright?" he turned to Two-Bit: "You coming?"

"Naw, I'll leave the three of you alone, and besides, I don't have a permission. The secretary lady don't like me that much."

Soda grinned: "Well, it ain't my fault if she likes me!" he teased before turning around. He then noticed I was crying. "Sybil? What's the matter? I didn't mean…it ain't like I care about the secretary lady, she must be 30 something…"

"It's not that, you idiot!" I cried. "I missed you so much, I can't believe you're right in front of me now!"

He pulled me close to him and held me in his arms. "Don't cry, you're with me now. Hey, Pony, don't you start cryin' too!"

I could hear Pony mumble a muffled response, meaning he was weeping too. But for once, ours were tears of joy.


	20. Waiting is the hardest part

**20 – Waiting is the hardest part**

My father and Darry were pretty mad when Ponyboy and I went back home. We had ended up staying for the night in some cheap hotel close to where Soda and Two-Bit stayed, just so we could spend Sunday with them, and the whole day had been one of the best I had experienced since Soda had left. Two-Bit and Pony even left us alone for a couple of hours and I felt relieved noticing Soda hadn't changed. He was still the same happy-go-lucky guy, who grinned so much he made you grin in spite of yourself.

He had told me one year in the army was as much as they could oblige him to do, that was the law, and since two months had already gone by, we'd just have to wait other ten months. Ten. He tried to cheer me up, but we both felt like ten months were a whole life. And we knew he'd probably get sent to Vietnam… and not last that much.

That horrible feeling of foreboding never left me since I got home. It lasted two weeks. Then I got Soda's letter. He was going to Vietnam.

I spent the following week in my bedroom, crying and feeling useless and hating everyone and everything, me included, because the person I loved most in the world had to leave and probably get badly injured or…killed…and I was safe, at home, while I knew if something happened to him I'd lose my mind. I started hating my country, my President and the ones before him and every single guy older than 18 who hadn't received a draft letter.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Summer never seemed to go by. I prayed everyday, I went to church everyday, I checked anxiously the mailbox everyday to see if Soda had written. So far, I had received some letters from him, which meant he was still alive and well, since he signed them all with the date on top. Sometimes there were Two-Bit's joking notes in the corners of the paper, like he was trying to cheer us all up. So far, it seemed like luck hadn't deserted us. Pony started coming with me to church, too, like once a week, and I sometimes spent whole days at the Curtis' house, since it looked like Darry didn't hate me anymore. We actually got along just fine and we both tried to help Ponyboy, who was the youngest and very sensitive. Of course, Darry was going through a lot, too, he had so many responsibilities and he had to encourage his brother, while encouraging himself.

I used to bump into Seth every now and then whenever I went to places like the mall and I was surprised to see he was much calmer than his usual self and he never once asked me to go out with him, or mentioned Soda.

September came and school began, once again. I was in 12th grade, so that would be my last year, and Pony was in his 11th, having skipped one school year 'cause he was really smart. For my birthday, in late September, I got a very long letter signed by Soda which was full of his deepest thoughts and prayers, and there was even a poem. One of his mates had taught him that, it was John Keats's _Ode on a Grecian Urn. _Soda had learned by heart the whole poem and wrote some verses, the final ones, for me. They brought tears to my eyes every time I read them.

_When old age shall this generation waste, thou shalt remain, in midst of other woe_

_Than ours, a friend to man, to whom thou say'st,_

"_Beauty is truth, truth beauty." _

_That is all ye know on earth, and all ye need to know._

I perfectly knew Soda wasn't a bookish type like Pony was and I understood his effort in mentioning those verses. He was trying to be better for me, he was doing a big effort for me…and I couldn't do anything to support him. In his letters, he wouldn't tell me much about his daily routine, he usually avoided talking about fights or camping or such. He said he hadn't been hurt yet. I somehow couldn't believe him completely.

I was also concerned with my father, who hadn't been feeling well all summer. I thought he just worked too much to earn money for us, for me to go to college, but when he finally went to some doctor in October we found out he had to take care of himself and rest more because he had a heart disease. The doc said it wasn't anything serious if my dad kept it in control.

So, as October went by and I struggled not to suffer from depression, I found out something that shocked me.

I was leaving some library with Pony (we liked going there together, we could give each other advice) when some guy crashed into him and he almost fell to the floor. He was carrying several bags. "I'm sorry, I didn't see you." He apologized.

And I almost fainted. "Lewis?"

"Sybil…hi…how are you?" he looked real puzzled.

"Why didn't you tell me you're back in town? I thought you had gotten your draft letter!"

"I did, but…" he trailed off.

"You what?"

"Listen, I…I'm in a hurry. I gotta go. I'll talk to you soon. I'll call you. Bye."

"Wait!" I grabbed him. "You'd rather have me believe you were away fighting than…than see me?"

"Of course not, it's just…it's complicated, okay? You can't understand. I have to go."

I watched him run away. I didn't feel like stopping him.

Pony got closer to me. "I'm sure there's a good reason…"

"He never cared about me and my father, he never did…cause if he did…he'd say something! And he's here and safe and well, while Soda, who's caring, sweet, nice and kind toward everyone…Soda's fighting and risking his own life…and we can't do anything…we can't…" I was in a daze. I couldn't even cry. I wasn't able to. "Do you mind…if I go home right now?"

"Of course not…are you sure you want to be alone?"

"Yes…thank you."

-------------------------------------------------------------

On Soda's birthday, on October 8th, I lit some candles in my room and prayed and prayed for him. I didn't do anything else. I thought of him and all our moments together, I thought of his adorable smile, of his beautiful eyes, his warm hands, his great voice… I re-read all the letters he had sent to me since he had left Tulsa.

_Dear Sybil,_

_Here I am, writing another letter and praying you'll get it, cause you never know…I'm hopefull though. Things are a bit rough over here, but the thought of you and Pony and Darry and my life in Tulsa keeps me going. And Two-Bit's with me so things aren't that bad. He misses the guys too and most of all he mises his beloved beer, he often wakes me up because of his dreams about beer when he starts yelling cause he can't get any, and besides, he's an awful snorer and whenever I can I don't sleep in the same tent as him (even if some times we don't get to sleep in tents, but it's ok now cause I'm used to it). _

His spelling mistakes made me smile for a second. And the Two-Bit mention, too.

_I'm awful sorry I can't be there for your birthday but we'll make up for it when I come back. I'll also need to buy you something. Here's what you should do: think about what you'd like to get, so I can get my gift for you coming home from the airport. I mean, I'm not getting your present in Tulsa's airport but as I come home I'd stop by some shop. _

I found it ironic that he was asking me what I wanted as a present while I had everything I needed but him, and he was away fighting. I should have been the one asking him that.

_I've been thinking about Mickey Mouse, you know that horse I looked after when I was younger. I think I should have known better than get so attached to him but he was a tuff horse. All this horse-talking makes me feel like wanting to ride one. I haven't ridden one in ages. Well, enough with Mickey Mouse…_

Maybe I should have gotten him a horse…

_I dreamt about you last night. I usually don't dream much or don't remember what I dream, but the dream I had was really tuff. I was walking home from work and when I got there you were waiting for me on the porch and you were so beautiful, breath-taking even. I hope my dream becomes true and I can come back to find you waiting for me. _

_I miss you…_

I bit my lip. I missed him too. I hoped he had gotten my last letter, a really long one where I told him I'd be waiting for him forever, if it was necessary, and even more, and I couldn't wish for anyone else. I felt uncomfortable around other guys, even Seth, even if he was nice. Even if, in June, I had been afraid I would be driven toward him by my weakness. But things weren't like that, I knew no boy could replace Soda.

I knew I could wait. I knew Soda would get back, safe. I knew it. But it still hurt.


	21. New Years' Eve

I hope everyone enjoys this chapter! I'm in a hurry so I can't really write much else, but I wanted to let you all know that the 22nd chapter will be the last one!

**21 – New Years' Eve**

By December, I wasn't getting any more letters. I knew Soda could have some troubles sending letters and writing them, because he said he was always so tired and he couldn't wait till he got home in Tulsa to sleep in his old, warm, comfortable bed, once again. And I imagined it wasn't that easy to send those letters from there. So, I tried not to get too anxious, but it was difficult. I had no idea what was going on in Vietnam, almost. I didn't realize all the pain and horror the soldiers, for the most part very young boys, were going through. I'd only understand much later, and understand a very small part of it, because you had to be there to really get the meaning of what was going on.

I didn't tell my father about Lewis being in town: dad didn't need anymore worries than the ones he already had and I was hoping I would hear from my brother, that he'd call me, but at the same time I didn't want to hear from him, because he had deceived me.

Sophie and Julian had broken up and she had more free time, so we started getting together more often. She missed having a boyfriend but wouldn't go back with Julian cause he "was a jerk", she said, and she hoped she could meet someone else soon. Of course, she didn't realize she was lucky that she wasn't already in love with someone far away from her, someone risking his life everyday. I had to keep myself from yelling at her sometimes. She didn't understand me, she didn't understand me at all, but then again no one did. Maybe Pony could understand. But Soda was the one who had always understood everything, almost.

I spent Christmas with dad and during the holidays I almost always studied or read books or met Ponyboy and Darry. I had baked a cake for them, since I didn't know what gifts they could appreciate, and I was sure they'd enjoy a big chocolate cake. Soda loved everything chocolate and he had told me several times his brothers were the same.

On December 31st I didn't feel like celebrating New Years Eve. My father had been invited to some fancy place where his lawyer buddies were, too, and he had insisted I'd go with him, but I told him I would only get bored. He had asked me to go out with Sophie or someone, because he didn't want me to be alone, but I pretended to be really tired and he eventually left, telling me to have a good rest.

It was only nine and a half and I didn't know what to do. I just sat on the sofa, listening to Elvis. Doing that always reminded me of Soda. One of our favorite songs was _Can't help falling in love with you…_we both could relate to the lyrics a lot…

The doorbell rang. I thought I would ignore it, because it was probably just some annoying visitor. Actually, I couldn't think of anyone in their right mind who would come and visit for New Years' Eve without being invited first.

However, it looked like the visitor wasn't willing to give up easily. They wouldn't stop ringing, so I eventually got up to see who it was. I opened the door and looked toward the gate. Then I saw him. The one I had been waiting for. I ran outside and reached him. I couldn't speak.

Soda's hair was quite short but not as short as I thought it would be; he was wearing dark green clothes that did nothing but underline his slenderness; he looked worn-out, like he could barely stand. I couldn't see the look in his eyes, cause it was pretty dark.

As if he had noticed my insecurity, he whispered: "It's really me…" He spoke more clearly: "Sybil…"

I can't recall exactly what happened afterwards. I remember I threw myself into his arms, I didn't cry but got very close to it, or maybe I did cry, who knows, and Soda and I went inside, but he couldn't speak for a while. I waited. He tried to talk more than once, but he always caught himself before pronouncing any word.

"You don't need to say anything…" I finally told him.

He slightly nodded, before enveloping me in a tight embrace. After a while, he started crying, but just kept holding me and so I held him, for how long, I don't know.

-------------------------------------------------------------

Soda had been sent back to the US after he had caught some illness in Vietnam: he needed medical help they couldn't give him there, so he got sent to Florida along with others soldiers, like him, badly injured, and stayed there for a couple of weeks, until, once recovered, they finally gave him permission to go back to his hometown. He also had a huge wound in his stomach which was almost completely healed, that would only leave a scar. He told me they had shot him and he had been lucky because he had been only superficially harmed.

I couldn't even imagine what he had gone through during the past months and he wouldn't talk about it. The first days in Tulsa were hard for him: he wouldn't speak much, not with me, nor with Pony or Darry or Steve, and when he did, he'd ask me questions about those past months or about ordinary things. I couldn't see that lively sparkle in his eyes anymore, but I was sure he needed time to recover mentally. My father told me the body's wounds were nothing compared to the ones of the mind.

Some people would even look at Soda like he was some kind of monster, when all he had done was fight for his country. No one cared about the boys and men who were slowly starting to come back from Vietnam, most people thought they were killers and tried to avoid them at all costs. Soda couldn't even get his old job at the DX, but he didn't care much, he was sure he'd find something else. He said every day was a better day for him. He felt bad for Two-Bit who was still in Vietnam, but when he had left he was doing just fine and only a couple of months had to pass before old Two-Bit could come back, too.

Finally, in February, a month after he had come back, Soda opened up to me.

"Sybil, I did horrible things while I was away…when I recall them I feel like the most disgusting person on earth…"

"Don't talk like that, Soda!"

"You need to know, Sybil! You need to know what I did, because you need to choose…if you want to stay with me or leave me now… even if I know that if you break up with me, I'll probably lose my mind. I don't know how I managed not to get insane while I was there… I don't know how I managed to do it all, day after day…"

I was worried about him. I didn't want him to recall those events if he wasn't ready. "Soda, you don't need to…"

"Just listen." He took a deep breath. "I killed. Not only the enemies, but also innocent people, cause they told us we had to…some of us didn't want to, some of us were more than willing to do it, and in the end we all did because we'd be in huge trouble if we disobeyed. And I…I took drugs. Many boys took drugs, because we didn't know how to go on…they made us feel better, I felt better…"

I didn't know what to say. I was taken aback. I never thought Soda would take drugs…if he had done that, he must have really needed to, how could I blame him? But still…it was a shock to hear his confession.

"There were places you could go to if you wanted some company…if you wanted to…with some girl…" he continued. "Most guys, young and not so young, used to go there, too…but I…I never went, because I love you, Sybil. I couldn't…" he trailed off. "I wish I could forget about it all, about all the blood spilled that I saw, about the screams I heard…you don't know why they sent me back…"

"You said you were sick…"

He nodded. "But my twelve months weren't over and, after recovering, I should have gone back…but they didn't want me anymore because…because they said I developed some mental illness." Soda looked up at me: "I don't know why they think that, but now I'm home I'm fine! I don't want you to think I ain't right in the head …"

"I don't think that, I could never think that! I love you…and I would never leave you." I took his hands. "You think I can help you?"

"Yeah…stay with me."

I couldn't ignore what Soda had told me about his days in Vietnam, but he hadn't done anything bad, he had done what he had to do… I couldn't be mad at him but at the same time I took my time to think about it. I didn't want to ask him questions because I knew he was still emotionally troubled, and I thought if they had said he had some mental issues, that was definitely true in part…but how could a nineteen-year-old experience such horrors and be the same as he was before?


	22. Changes

So…this is the final chapter! I hope you all like it…and if you wished for this story to keep going, don't worry, because I'm going to put up the sequel soon!

Until then…thanks to everyone who read my story!

**22 - Changes**

Soda and I didn't spend much time together, in the following couple of months: I had to improve my grades and therefore spent several afternoons at school, often in the library, and studied. In the meantime, he was looking for a job: the news about him being back from Vietnam spread fast and it seemed like no one would want him to work for them. I couldn't understand why. He had fought for his country, risking his life, he had been sent there, he had not chosen to go and slaughter people, but still the Tulsans thought he was a criminal.

Well, not really everyone. My father understood and said he'd do anything he could to help, but none of us could do much: me, Pony, Darry, Steve…could only stay with Soda. It wasn't like getting sick and taking some pills to feel better once again.

But I noticed, day by day, Soda was slowly starting to feel better. He started grinning more, like he used to do before leaving, and his eyes sometimes were showing that lively sparkle once again. That was probably also because Two-Bit came back in the end of March, too: he couldn't almost hear from his left ear anymore and when they had sent him back he had several broken bones, but he was doing much better, now he was in Tulsa. He and Soda would never forget, but their life would improve, even if nightmares would haunt them for several years. Soda told me about some of them and they were so hideous I was grateful they were only dreams that looked too much like real life. He and Two-Bit were thankful, they said they had been lucky.

When I graduated from high school, in May, the guys all came to see me, and I loved their presence there (despite many people not thinking exactly like me). Two-Bit even hit it off right away with some platinum blonde girl. Soda, on the other hand, was deeply annoyed because more than one girl wouldn't stop staring at him and trying to start a conversation.

"Now my hair's long once again, girls notice me more. Maybe I should cut it."

"Don't you dare!" his friends shouted.

"Hey, Sybil, what d'you think? Should I cut my hair?" he asked, when I reached them after I had gotten my certificate.

"Well, it's up to you…" I received quite a few glares from the guys. "I love you the way you are, but not because of your hair…but I have to say…you look dazzling with long hair. Just like James Dean in _Rebel Without a Cause…_you're the two most gorgeous guys in the world." I smiled.

"He ain't in the world anymore, he's dead." Soda reminded me.

"Well then, I guess _you_ are the most gorgeous guy in the world."

"Thanks." He kissed me lightly on the lips. The other boys all "booed" us.

I laughed and turned around, to see how many people were still there. Then I saw him. I got up and ran to the place where he was standing.

"Congratulations." He smiled. "These are for you." He handed me some flowers.

"Lewis…" I cried. "How could you…? Do you have the slightest idea about…how worried I was?"

"No. I can imagine. But you didn't need me in your life…I wasn't sent to Vietnam, Sybil. I couldn't find any jobs here in town, so… I started selling stuff. You know what I mean…"

"Drugs?" I whispered.

He nodded. "I didn't know how to go on if I didn't."

"You could have asked dad for money, you could have come back home!"

"No, you know that wouldn't work. Anyway, I've stopped now." He looked around. "Which one of them is your boyfriend?"

I turned. Pony, Soda, Darry, Two-Bit and Steve, still in their seats, were all staring at us.

"Soda's the one with blond hair."

"So he's a Greaser."

"Yeah."

"Do you love him?"

"Yeah." I repeated.

"I said…you didn't need me in your life. Actually…you don't need me." He sighed. "I'm leaving Tulsa and I don't think I'm ever coming back. I made so many mistakes, I don't think I'll ever stop or even slow down. But I can't stay. I'm not a good guy. I'm not like you, mom or even…dad. Tell him I'm sorry I'm not the son he wanted. But he's not the father I wanted, either."

"Lewis…"

"I have to go."

"If you can't stay…and you say you won't come back…will you at least write? To let me know you're safe…and if you need anything…"

"I know. I promise I'll try."

"You're my brother…" I hugged him. "Take care."

He smiled and left. I went back and sat next to Soda. I was crying. He put his arm around me and tried to comfort me. I didn't know why, but Lewis wasn't a criminal to me, even if he had sold drugs, and he wasn't a bad person, even if he had done stupid stuff and didn't pay any attention to other people's feelings. He was my brother. I would always think of him as the little boy who would play with me all day and sometimes make fun of me, because I was a girl, and younger.

-----------------------------------------------------

Soda finally found a job: he started working in some farm where he had to teach people how to ride horses, and stuff like that. He would ride horses and feed them and clean them, and he enjoyed it. He said it was relaxing and they paid him better than the DX's responsible ever did.

In the summer I didn't know what to do. I had always thought I'd study law at college, because I wanted to be just like my father, but I wasn't so sure anymore. I would stay in Tulsa, though, both because of Soda and of my dad. I wouldn't go to some place far from Oklahoma just because they supposedly had better colleges.

"Have you decided what you want to study, Sybil?" Soda asked me one day, while I was watching him work at the farm. It was very hot, being July, and he was busy feeding the horses.

"Kind of…"

"That means?"

"English literature."

"'Cause you love reading."

I didn't answer. I wasn't so sure anymore of what I wanted to do, what I wanted to become.

"Hey, Sybil. Look at me." I did. "You'll do well. I know."

"Thanks."

He grinned. "I can't believe it. It seems like yesterday we started dating and you had just started 11th grade. And this year, Pony's going to finish high school, too. He's almost seventeen. It's scary."

"And you're going to be twenty."

"Don't remind me! I feel old."

"And I'm going to be nineteen. I can't believe it. I feel old too."

Soda didn't say anything for a while. "It's strange. I always thought by this day…Darry would have gone to college, because he's brainy and deserves it. But…he's still working like a madman to support our family. And I ain't under his custody anymore. It's so weird. Pony's the only baby now. Kind of." He fell silent again. "It's Friday, I don't have to work tomorrow…wanna come over tonight?"

"Sure, if Darry and Pony don't mind."

"Of course they don't. They loved that last cake you baked for us…I almost couldn't eat any because they were faster than me."

I laughed. "I'll make another. Hey, I have to go home now or dad won't let me see you tonight."

"Okay. I'll see you later…" he grinned, playfully. I didn't know why, but I'd find out only that very night.

I found out dad didn't look very well when I got home. He looked like something was not right, but as I made dinner and asked for his permission to see Soda later that day he smiled and said it was fine with him, if I came home before midnight. Of course I would.

When I reached the Curtis' house that night, with a freshly baked cake just like the last one Pony and Darry had loved so much, Soda was waiting in the kitchen, barefeet and clad only in a pair of jeans. I blushed because he noticed I was staring and he grinned. "Hey."

"Hey…this is for you guys." I gave him the cake. "I hope it's as good as the last one."

"Thanks. Can I taste it now?" he didn't wait for my answer and took a piece. "It's delicious!"

"Great…I was afraid it wouldn't taste really good."

Soda finished chewing on the piece he had in his mouth and then spoke: "Darry and Pony are both out, they won't come back before a couple of hours or so. They'll love it when they come back. Actually, Sybil…" he motioned for me to follow him in his bedroom and I did it. "I asked them to go out for some time." He motioned for me to sit on the bed.

I didn't understand what he was saying, so I just nodded. Soda continued: "Don't freak out at me, okay? Just listen." He cleared his throat and took something which was placed on the desk, before grabbing my hand. "I don't know what…I don't know what my life would be like without you. You, Pony and Darry are my life. I know I ain't good enough for you, I've never been from the start, but still you've stayed with me…through it all…you're still with me…I'm a lucky guy…but I will be even more lucky if…" he paused. "If you marry me."

I didn't freak out. Actually, I didn't say anything, I just stared in disbelief at the ring he had given to me. It wasn't one of those stunning rings every woman wants to have, but it was Soda's gift to me, and for that, I thought it was the most precious piece of jewellery I had ever seen.

Soda was waiting for me to say something. He looked anxious. I couldn't speak. I couldn't _think_. I had college ahead, could I still marry him? Could I live with him? Would it be the right thing to do? But his eyes were looking at me like I was some goddess fell from the sky to fulfill all his wishes, like I was some kind of angel, and I finally formed my answer. "I will marry you!"

"Really?" I nodded. "You sure? Do you wanna think about it some more?" I shook my head. He grinned crazily. "I'm the happiest man on earth!" he kissed me. "I can't wait till Pony and Darry come back! I have to tell them! Or maybe I could phone Steve and tell him, or Two-Bit…" he rushed toward the phone.

"Soda, wait!" I laughed. "Would you mind waiting a bit? I can't believe you asked me, I still need to realize this isn't a dream…don't tell others for a while…please."

"Ok." He reached me. "Hey, I'll put your ring on." He did it. And it looked amazing, there on my finger. "It's wonderful." I said.

"This is the engagement one, I didn't buy something really fancy because I want you to have a great wedding ring." He grinned. "Hey, Sybil, don't stare like that. You're gonna get used to see me without shirts on."

I blushed. "Don't make fun of me!"

"I ain't!"

"Yeah, you are!"

"If you like me like this, I can stop wearing shirts. At least now, since it's summer." He grinned.

I was staring at his scar. I put my hand on it. It was quite large, just a bit above his belly. I touched it, but Soda didn't wince. I had to ask him something. "How many girls have you…slept with?"

He looked surprised. "Sandy was my first. And after her, another one…that I didn't date really, I only…" he trailed off.

"I must have driven you insane."

Soda didn't say anything at first, just stared at me. "If you wanna wait till we're married, it's fine with me."

I shook my head and I kissed him. He kissed me back. We couldn't stop, so we didn't.

--------------------------------------------------------

When I got home, it was almost midnight. I was feeling strange. I couldn't tell anyone what had happened in Soda's bedroom, even if feeling as close as humanly possible to him had been one of the best experiences of my life, but I had to tell dad about the marriage. I was afraid he would get mad and tell me I couldn't marry him, especially not before going to college.

Dad was still awake in his studio, with a huge book opened in front of him. He looked extremely tired, and older, too. When I knocked and he noticed me, he wearily smiled. "Sybil, I need to tell you something."

"What is it, dad? You should rest, you look so worn-out…"

"Don't worry. Well, they made me do some exams at the hospital…for my heart, you know. It's not in good shape like we thought."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't have much time left."

I stared at him. I refused to understand.

"Sybil…in less than a year I'll be gone."

I shook my head. "No! They probably got the wrong results for your exams…"

"I made them all twice."

"Well then, they're all idiots! You're not dying. You're not…"

"I'm sorry I'm leaving you while you're still so young, but I can't do anything. It's not like tomorrow I'll be dead, though, we still have months to spend together. Don't cry…I'll reach your mom, you know? She probably misses me, and you too. But you have a life ahead, I'm old and I feel old…"

"You're only fifty!"

"My body may not be that old, but my soul is. I'm very tired. I hope I have been a good father for you, since apparently I didn't do well with Lewis."

I started crying like a child. My dad was leaving me. Life was cruel. My father and Soda were all I had.

--------------------------------------------------

My father died a month after Soda and I's wedding, in October. He had left me money enough to go through college and also some more he had been able to save. He wanted me to sell the house when he would pass away, because part of the money would go to me, and another part to some bank. By doing that, Soda and I were able to get a small house near the one where he had always lived with his brothers, and he didn't have to drive himself insane working because we had some money saved. I wouldn't start working until college was over.

One night, Soda and I were lying in bed, both awake, both not caring to fall asleep, since the following day was Saturday. So far, married life had been great. We didn't argue and we didn't have any serious problems. The guys visited us all the time, when we didn't visit them, since the streets were close.

"Sybil?"

"Yes?"

"I'm glad you stopped at the DX, that one day, even if you hated Greasers. Even if you thought I had a weird name."

"I didn't think that. I liked your name from the beginning."

"Thanks."

I got closer to him and rested my head on his chest. "And I'm glad, too."

THE END 


End file.
